Political Humor

Conservative Political Humor|Satire|Parody

Posts from — April 2006

Learn to Speak German

I still can’t determine what song I like best on the new album, but I sure can’t get enough of this one.

Play it on Castpost

I have Lyrics and Translation

I used a low bitrate to upload it, so it sounds a little crappy, but ONLY for that reason. Get the CD and turn it up LOUD!!!

April 26, 2006   7 Comments

Machine Coded Matrix

I must admit. When I first heard of the machine coded matrix, I was suspicious. I thought, “Come on. You guys are putting me on. So, I did the obvious thing. I ran a search engine on it. It was difficult trying to parse the false information from the truth about the machine coded matrix, but what I learned was delightfully surprising.

The machine coded matrix is good for tracking down one of Chloe’s work-arounds, of course, but there’s a lot that you probably didn’t know. It also can do your taxes for you. I know, you’re thinking, “Now he tells me! I wish I had known that 2 weeks ago.”

Don’t fret. The machine coded matrix is useful all year ’round.

  • It removes tough stains,
  • it gets that urine smell out of the carpet, and best of all,
  • it’s made from 100% recycled materials.

Your dishes will be spotless, your pans will be truly non-stick for life, guaranteed.

It slices, it dices, you can even cut a tin can with it.

Don’t worry guys, you can use it too. Don’t you hate it when you can’t find the remote? Guess what? The machine coded matrix will locate it for you, and surf through channels while it does. Forgot your anniversary? The machine coded matrix has it covered.

We all wish there was more time in the day to do the things we enjoy, but THERE’S NO TIME!!! The machine coded matrix has changed all that. Whether you want to fold the space time continuum like Jack, or if you just want to freeze time for a few hours while you look for free pr0n on the internet, the machine coded matrix can do it.

Place your orders now! Supplies are limited. Call now! 1-555-MC-MATRIX

Results not guaranteed. Not available in the United States or Canada, or anywhere else for that matter. Not an actual product. Results may vary. If you experience an erection lasting 4 hours or longer, discontinue use and consult your physician.

April 25, 2006   8 Comments

Flight 93: The Movie

If you haven’t seen the trailer you can see it in a crappy small resolution version at Flight93.net.

I’ve been hearing about how people seeing the trailer for the movie are all upset that the images presented are too disturbing. I don’t get it. I didn’t see much at all in the trailer that seemed to have disturbing images. It was actually pretty tame.

I don’t know if they modified the preview or not, but I didn’t see any disturbing images. I had some disturbing emotions. I can say that. Maybe that’s what people are afraid of – emotions.

I was reminded of just how “Eff ‘em all!” I felt that day. I was reminded that I don’t give a crap about the “rights” of scum with less regard for human life than a maggot has. I felt pissed, on a monumental scale.

I didn’t cive a crap about “human rights” for terrorist scum, and I didn’t care about spreading democracy. I only cared about payback.

So now the anger has risen again. Screw the “detainees” at G’itmo. Don’t tell me about human rights. These festering plagues have forfeit their humanity, and their rights. I would be far more concerned with the rights of maggots than the rights of pedophile death cultists bent on the destruction of western civilization.

They forfeit their humanity, and their rights when they decided that children and falafel stands were legitmate military targets. When they decided that innocent civilians were the enemy, they forfeit their rights. They became more worthless than any virus, when they refused to abide by one single convention of war.

I don’t care. Turn the crapweasels into ash.

I am actually torn. On one hand, it would be much more fun to think up the most inhumane, excruciating methods of death and torture for these bacterial infections of humanity. Not to extract information, but just because they so richly deserve it.

On the other hand, it’s just not efficient. It may be fun to find the termites and burn them with lighters, pull off their legs, and various other cruel things, but at the end of it, you still have a termite problem. The thing to do is bomb the house with poison, and exterminate them.

No more termite problem.

There’s a reason why this site is called Radioactive Liberty. In case you’re having difficulty bumping those brain cells into each other to come up with the reason why, here’s a hint.

I can’t wait until the movie comes out. I hope it’s all it’s hyped up to be, and then some. If anything, it’s been too long coming. I just might have to get a babysitter so I can see it opening weekend.

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Trackbacked on Mudville Gazette

April 24, 2006   6 Comments