Yawn. Today is December 7th, and that means we’re supposed to have an obligatory post about Pearl Harbor, “A day that will live in infamy,” and act all like we love America, and all that jingoistic bullcrap. Blah. Blah. Blah.

So what? On his day in history, decades before I was born a bunch of disaffected Asian youths expressed their frustration with American imperialism the only way their repressed and beautiful culture knew how, by striking an American interest, that isn’t even part of the American mainland. Big deal. A lot of stuff happened before I was born.

Then President someone or other declared war on Japan. It was a quagmire, but we lost our focus when the President lied our way into war with Germany, who had nothing to do with Pearl Harbor. This was also a quagmire. The President destroyed the civil rights of all Americans by rounding up people of Asian descent and probably made them wear panties on the head and make naked pyramids.

Finally, some other President committed a war crime and used an atom bomb to commit genocide against the Japanese. We then imposed democracy on the Japanese and Germans, even though they didn’t want democracy, and we still haven’t redeployed our troops.

The more things change, the ore they stay the same.

Category: Caustic Sarcasm