Political Humor | Are We All Insane?

This is part 3 of 6 of Proclamations from the Mountaintop, a Political Humor Series by Les James.

THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD

Original Image by T. Keller

Stop holding your breath. Here it is, another totally biased view! Another “think piece”. That means you, not me. It’s rather obvious I didn’t. Another instalment of boy this guy is right on, or that dude is a total jerk.

Either way I suppose the only way you know that is because you’ve read this drivel before. Either way I win. So here’s the latest from yours truly.

Today it’s all about the children. OK, it really is all about me, but at least I’m adult enough to admit it. So, without further ado.

Have you ever really looked into the eyes of a toddler during a temper tantrum?

It’s like looking into the eyes of a deranged psychotic killer. How do I know what that looks like? It’s simple. I watch a lot of TV. Murder -cold blooded, evil murder- at least in our society, is not the act of a sane person. And yet when I look into those young eyes…

I started to dwell on childhood sanity years ago. A band you might have heard of called The Doors was fronted by a tragically flawed but brilliant lead singer by the name of Jim Morrison. Jim knew how to turn a phrase. He also knew how to abuse drugs and alcohol, but that’s the ending to another story.

Anyway, in one of their songs – I think it was called The End, or something like that (I could look it up, but why bother?) - There is a reference to a “wilderness of pain where all the children are insane.” Cool, huh?

Children being insane stuck with me. Though I doubt Jim meant it in the way I have since thought about that line. It caused me to look a bit deeper and I began to believe that they truly are, or maybe I’m just asserting this to pull your chain.

What is sanity?

This brought up the question of how we judge a persons mental state. What is sanity? It seems to be a lot like pornography. Few can tell you what it is but they know it when they see it, or more likely in this case, when they don’t.

For the sake of a simple illustration lets consider sanity to be a bubble. Those of us inside are sane, while those outside are barking mad.

The ones outside have a disease, a dreadful contagious malady. They drool on the Bubble as they leer and think unclean thoughts about us. The insane are a very scary bunch. That’s why when we find them we put them in soft rooms and shoot them full of mind-altering drugs. Jim would’ve approved.

Then there are those who make demands as they cry that fake cry in an effort to manipulate. They drool and think about inflicting pain as they thrash about, kicking and screaming on the floor. They throw things and speak small, mean words. They are our own flesh and blood. They are toddlers.

Give these children pint-sized guns and they’ll pull the triggers with no remorse.

Outside of the really mentally twisted few - those who truly lack the ability to tell right from wrong - there are the Societally Insane.

These are the folks that walk among us, not wearing those clever tight fitting canvas jackets with too many straps and buckles. Lacking those fine young men in their clean white coats chasing them with butterfly nets, they’re hard to pick out in a crowd.

The Societally Insane have emotional issues that – in many cases - they could control themselves, but refuse to take responsibility for their actions. It can’t be their fault they would maintain. If you’ve never read about them in your psychology books, it could be because I just made it up.

Remember that I never claimed to have any formal training, just a lot of opinions. Save your breath, I know what opinions are like.

So getting back to the youngsters. They tend to grow up as normal, sometimes happy people who lead normal somewhat productive lives. Kind of like you and me.

I say “you” assuming you are not currently scrolling with your tongue since your hands seem to be rather tied up at the moment. And no, I didn’t type this with mine. I’m in the Bubble with you.

Can Sanity be Taught?

Image: Teaching Geeks by Salendron

The next question for me was how do we habilitate – the step before rehabilitation - our laughing one moment screaming the next seaming bi-polar rug rats and thereby create functional human beings? Wow, it’s so easy, we teach them! Yeah, just teach them to be sane!

Bet you didn’t see that coming. We give them love and we nurture them. We train and reward and discipline them. We shepherd them and bring them along into the fold. We show them how to respectfully live in the Bubble with us.

Now it’s here where a few of you will start screaming about being a non-conformist. I hope you realize that you have to fit inside certain boundaries to be a non-conformist. That’s what happens with labels.

Still, you insist on standing up on top of your beat to snot VW vans expectorating non-sequiturs (Spitting out nonsense. Why couldn’t I just say that?) about how you reject the world’s current path and now stagger off track to the beat of a different bongo. Yeah, whatever, the Bubble is a big place, you live there too.

Perhaps you dream of being a flamboyant, filthy rich eccentric who lives on a privately owned island and is never seen? Chances are you’ll still be judged sane. Get used to it.

In an age when it’s practically obligatory to celebrate diversity, it’s hard to be crazy. I love going to parties where everyone is offended by someone else! I guess that’s what being open-minded and tolerant means. Wow, sidetracked and sarcastic too.

It seems to me that sanity is mostly what a group of folks living in a certain geographical location say it is. It changes and evolves over time. New ideas shape sanity into a version that conforms, comforts and feels good to the wearer.

People look good in it and it is always in fashion. Look at the people you admire. I’d bet they wear their sanity like a tailored designer suit, or pants suit. I’d hate to appear a sexist on top of everything else.

So sanity is little more than the collective opinion that forms norms and standards. Burning witches and cannibalism do seem to be out of vogue with the sane crowd these days. But who knows, they may make a resurgence, as most fashions do, so don’t throw out your favorite deviation just yet!

I think that most would agree that murder most foul is not an act committed by a rational being. It falls outside the parameters of good taste and decorum. It lacks proper manners and thoughtfulness of others.

Don’t get me started on manners. That’s a subject best left for a time when more lines are available. Hint. Hint. In fact I believe we could categorize murder as an insane act if you were to accept my train of thought.

Which brings me to one of my pet peeves. Did I mention I have an entire zoo packed to the walls with my pets? Anyway. Temporary insanity should never be allowed as an excuse for bad behavior. Any defense that borrows heavily from a Monty Python movie scene concerning being turned into a newt- “I got better”- just doesn’t sit well with me.

Come on now lighten up. As I wrote earlier, there are a few really and truly, no kidding, honest to goodness, certifiable, creep me out crackpots out there and they need our help. But just because you got angry enough to do some dastardly deed by loosing control is not a reason to label you as a nut job, even if it was just temporary employment.

You shouldn’t get to pass go and collect some “free” mental health benefits.

You knew it was wrong and you did it anyway, so put on the blindfold and stand against the wall. You don’t get a cigarette any longer because we’re told second hand smoke can kill. Besides their bad for you, good for the economy, and the taxes go toward helping the children. Hey, wait a second! But I digress even further.

What does this all have to do with the subject? You might ask as I’ve seemed to have gotten off the main topic…again. It must be rock and roll nostalgia day, since as the Who sang, “The kids are alright”. We’re going to make sure of that. Now, if only some one would teach them some manners.

It’s the adults that have me worried. It kind of comes down to this; some folks get older but somehow seem to think that they can act out like toddlers for their entire lives.

I say give them a good Mother Goose, spank them all soundly and send them to bed.

Is it parody, or is it memorex?