Welcome to the Carnival of Comedy #59: Zarqawi’s Dead edition. I wanted to go with a War for Oil theme, but the participants voted with their submissions, and in my country, majority rules.

This weekly link fest wouldn’t be possible without IMAO, so we all have them to thank… Or blame. It’s also not possible without hosts, so volunteer to host by emailing spacemonkey [at] imao.us . If I have to bail out the carnival again, I will not be kind. I also heard rumors that there is some sort of annual IMAudiO thingy. Can anyone verify this? Spacemonkey? Anyone?

**

For some reason, we’re not allowed to use these things. I keep hearing about “collateral damage,” and “innocent civilians.” I thought we were in the business of murdering innocent civilians here. That’s what the “News” keeps telling me, so why not use the most effective means available? Anyhoo, here comes teh funny.

First up, the Editor’s Choice Award again goes to someone that didn’t actually submit an entry, but should have.

Johnny Virgil reminds me just how much I miss MST3K with his review of a truly terrible movie in As hard as it is to believe… Snort and spew alert. Profanity. [15 Minute Lunch]

**

Teh Funny!

The Evil Emperor Mindstation and a4g have the trailer for Brokeback al Zarqawi on a YouTube video. They also warn of NSFW for Profanity (The F-Bomb). [Point Five]

Some sort of predecessor to the Autorantic Virtual Moonbat takes on TekTak F. Mechanoid in Face 2 Face. I wonder if, like the autorant, telling it “truth” causes it to destruct. [The MoxArgon Group]

Dr. fmragtops has a patient that even the brilliant Dr, House can’t cure in Clinic Hours: Patient Impossible. What condition could a patient possibly have that Dr. House can’t fix? Go find out. [Blogs For House]

Vox Poplar uses some black magic to chat with al-Zarqawi in The Rumours of My Death Have Been Pretty Accurate. Some Sexual Themes [Vox Poplar is Right About Everything & Don't You Forget It!]

fmragtops brings volume 3 of the Hippy-pedia to the table with Hippy-pedia Vol III: Green Hippies. I always suspected that about bears, but now I know, and knowing is half the battle. [Fmragtops Spews]

The blue square proves that the sequel can never live up to the original in The Sad Turtle, Take Two. He does, however get points for kissing up to the host. Let this be a lesson to the rest of you. Blue Square, do not be fooled by the turtle’s apparent docile nature. It is lulling you into a false sense of security, and then when you least expect it, the Green Triangles will swarm out of flank two position. [The Order of the Blue Square]

**

We do get to use these though. We can all be thankful for that. How’s that feelin’ Abu?

Heh – Funny

We find out that attempting to avoid bad karma by spending the day with Peace Moonbeam, and a bit of Peyote is a bad idea in Devil’s Day. With friends like Peace… [The Peace Moonbeam Chronicles]

Chris Carlisle reveals the imminent threat of Biological Warfare For Children. Be afraid. Be very afraid. [The Dimmer Switch]

Vox Poplar & Abu Hamza al-Muhajir turn Pro Wrestling smack talk upside down in It Ain’t Me Babe, It Ain’t Me Your Lookin’ For!. Apparently, some people don’t much like 500 lb. headache relief. [Vox Poplar is Right About Everything & Don't You Forget It!]

The Cranky Insomniac demonstrates what would happen If Al-Qaeda issued press releases. Cranky, you know that if you just copy and paste an article from the New York Times and call it your own, that’s called plagiarism, right. Oh, wait. I see that al-Qaeda is an eeeevil corporation, not a struggling family business run by an oppressed minority. Never mind. [The Cranky Insomniac]

Damian G. informs us that Al Gore starts climate change re-education camp.. Isn’t it methane emissions that Taco Bell induces? [Conservathink]

Tommy attempts to parody cable “news” programming in A Treasure Trove, but unfortunately for Tommy, those “news” people are Hell-bent on making exaggeration impossible. [Striving For Average]

Bob Orr has the script to Zarqawi: The Musical. Plenty of musical parodies here, but I do see a glaring omission for the outro. [either orr]

So you had a bad day. They started droppin’ bombs.
The smoke starts to clear and another one comes.
They sift through the debris, and still you survive,
But in another hour you won’t be alive.
You had a bad day.

miriam presents New Fly in Residence appointed in Delaware. I don’t live far from Wilmington, DE, and I seem to have a whole Chamber of Congress full of resident flies. [miriam's ideas]

**

Ah! Now that’s what I like to see. Everybody loves a happy ending, don’t they? Thanks to Wild Bill for the festive decorations.

Meh, Funny?

Shamalama has the newest addition to the Mattel Barbie doll family. Be One Of The First To Own This Limited-Edition Collectible. I’ll pass, thanks. [Common Folk Using Common Sense]

Joan Conde finds al-Zarqawi’s Fan Letter to Steven Seagal. Who knew? [Mamacita]

Big Cajun Man presents Most Important Feature of a Credit Card. Some sarcasm, but not really that funny. [Canadian Financial Rants]

miriam says Curse Blogger! in a perfect demonstration of why you should never, under any circumstances compose your work in the blogger dashboard. I recommend and use NoteTab Light. In fact, this carnival was composed in NoteTab Light. See Bad Example for more details. [miriam's ideas]

Morg presents Weekend At Zarqie’s. Meh. [Morgnet]

Lisa presents More keyboard decor. Methinks Mama Duck needs to spend more time offering constructive activities for Baby Duck and less time on teh internets. [Lil' Duck Duck]

**

There’s still that which I regret, and that’s the fact that there is no Forest of Woe, upon which to perch the rotting corpse of the murderous thug. On a related note, Some of these submissions are making me think “Forest of Woe.”

Woe is Me. Not Funny

Chris Carlisle (and a Wookiee) has More Wookiee Nonsense. It’s a 20 minute podcast or something. I could only listen to about 2 minutes before the wookie annoyed the snot out of me. I don’t think things that irritate me are funny. [The Platypus Society]

Jerry Dante gives us a story about marijuana use. Hangin’ at the Ice Cream Joint. [Jerry Dante]

Robert Parker presents Mona Lisa Speaks – You Heard it Here or Somewhere Else. I wish I hadn’t heard it… at all. And again, punishing the senses with First Aid for Abu Musab al-Zarqwawi. I’m not aware of a Carnival of Dull, but I think that’s what this one should have been submitted to. [The View From Silverhorn Lodge - Robert Parkers Blog]

**

If you feel your entry has been treated unfairly, too bad. Tough it out. Better yet, volunteer to host one yourself, and exact your revenge on my entry that week. Email spacemonkey [at] imao.us . Submit your entries here or here. Open to anyone with a blog.

That’s all folks. Follow those links. Bookmark a few, or add them to your blogrolls. Thanks for visiting, and participating in “Teh Funniest Show on… Something.”

• Lil’ Duck Duck Linked with Homemade Pedialyte recipe
• The Cranky Insomniac Linked with Carnival of Comedy up
• Striving For Average Linked with Satirical Comedy
• Point Five Linked with COC #59 Sic Semper Zarqawi
• Basil’s Blog Linked with Notes and a Picnic 2006-06-16
• The Alliance Linked with Friday Linky Stuff

Category: Link Pimpin'