Since FIAR has sold out and become a damn, dirty, stinkin’, hippy, I have decided to mutiny. How can I contribute to a site run by a hippy that hasn’t had a bath in two days. I condemn his dirty, stinkin’, hippyness! *Shakes fist in condemnation in the general direction of PA* I am aware that FIAR has been a good blogfriend to me. He worked harder than I did when I switched from blogsnot to AN Hosting, and he allowed me to ambush his readers occasionally with my crappy writing about impaling hippies, and he did most of the work on the Carnival of Comedy on Blogs For House. However, due to his newly found hippyism, I have carefully thought out this measured and proportional response.

I must apologize for any indifference this mustiny may cause to you, the RL readers, but this is the only way. Fortunately, I know where FIAR lives, and as you read this I am on my way to PA to promptly impale him. Since I have mutinyed this site, it needs a new name. I was thinking of Fmragtops Liberty. I don’t know, what do you guys think? Leave suggestions in the comments section. Thatisall.

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UPDATED: It’s done. FIAR is now suspended from a pike in his backyard. He’ll soon assume room temperature….Well, outside air temperature. It was for your own good, buddy. Luckily I have a copy of his living will here:

I, FIAR, being of sound mind and body, do hereby declare that if I am ever converted to hippyism, I do not wish to live. I impart the task of ending my misery on Fmragtops. For his effort in this endeavor, I leave him all my worldly possessions.

Affiant’s Signature
FIAR

We here at Radioactive Spewage, bring you a historical event. The first ever mercy impaling.

In case you don’t believe we are currently embroiled in a World War, it appears India and Pakistan are getting in on the act. [Ctrl+C/Ctrl+V]

AP via Yahoo News

BOMBAY, India – India’s prime minister said Friday the Bombay train bombers were “supported by elements across the border” and that Pakistan must rein in terrorists before a peace process can move ahead.

In Islamabad, Pakistani Foreign Ministry spokeswoman Tasnim Aslam said Singh’s accusations were “unsubstantiated, and we have already rejected them.” She urged the peace process to go forward.

Correct me if I am wrong, but aren’t India and Pakistan nuclear? Fun times ahead.

What? That first quote isn’t enough to make you believe that India and Pakistan are about to go tete a tete? Try this one on for size, from the same article: [Ctrl+C/Ctrl+V]

An Indian Home Ministry official said that among the leads investigators were pursuing was the possible involvement of the outlawed Students Islamic Movement of India, which may have been aided by Pakistan’s Inter-Services Intelligence agency. The official requested anonymity because the inquiry is ongoing.

Pakistan also dismissed that allegation.

Granted, this doesn’t prove that Pakistan was involved with the Bombay train bombing, but it pretty clearly shows that India thinks that Pakistan is at the very least not doing enough to fight terrorism, and possibly that India believes the Pakistani government is providing material support for the terrorists that did this.

This is nothing short of a World War. Libtards like to talk about connecting the dots. Well, connect these frikkin dots, the US is engaged in fighting islamofascists in Iraq and Afghanistan, Great Britain is helping there as well, Israel is ramping up attacks against Hamas and Hezbollah. India and Pakistan are posturing for a possible scuffle. North Korea and Iran are rattling their nuclear sabers, and it’s widely believed that at least Iran has a hand in the violence targeting Israel. Russia, China, France, and Germany are resisting us every step of the way when it comes to taking action in any of these hot-spots presumably because they are supplying weapons to the islamofascists, and China, who covets Taiwan with whom we have an obligation to protect, is talking out of both sides of it’s mouth in regards to North Korea.

Best case scenario: These are isolated incidents that are going to pull the world into a protracted war against islamofascism.

Worst Case Scenario: These are coordinated incidents with our enemies pulling the strings in which case we’re about to get sucker punched…Again.

One more intersting quote: [Ctrl+C/Ctrl+V]

On Thursday, a man claiming to represent al-Qaida reportedly claimed the terror network had set up a wing in Muslim-majority Kashmir, where Islamic militants have been fighting for years for independence from predominantly Hindu India or union with mostly Muslim Pakistan.

There was no way to immediately verify the al-Qaida claim. If true, it would be the first time Osama bin Laden’s network has claimed to have spread into Indian territory.

It appears OBL will just set up shop wherever terrorism is tolerated. If this doesn’t suggest to you the importance of the entire world being vigilant against the spread of Islamofascism, then report immediately to The Daily Kos, where you can be debriefed by fearless leader.

It’s time buckle down and knuckle up. Shit’s getting hairy.

See also RichJ’s post that started this line of thought.

X-Posted at Aggressive Tendencies

Trackbacked (or trackedback) at The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler – Posts like this are why Misha is one of my blog-heros.

In a press conference today, highly respected international human rights group, Sweet Humans In Turbins (SHIT) Press Secretary, Ahma Dumfuk, responded today to terrorists killing 15 soldiers in Iraq.

“The terrorists in Iraq are brutal murderous thugs that should stand trial for warcrimes. The wholesale slaughter of the mighty Iraqi soldiers should not be accepted. There is no threat in this world today greater than that of the terrorists operating in Iraq.”

SHIT has been very outspoken at the way the terrorist bombings in Iraq have repeatedly targeted innocent victims like Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi. Dumfuk says his organization will continue to “stand against the cowardly acts of the terrorists in Iraq.” Dumfuk points to the terrorists making military targets out of old folks homes, forcing soldiers to bomb them as examples of the terrorists’ cowardice.

SHIT’s spokesman went on to call down America In Iraq leader, George W. Bush, for what he called human rights violations in connection with the kidnapped soldiers being held in Guantanimo Bay, Cuba. Dumfuk listed the extreme temperature variances, sleep deprivation, loud music, and forcefeeding the the kidnapees are subjected to as “abominations” that can not be tolerated by the civilized world.

An unnamed source, a terrorist speaking under condition of anonymity, said,

“Terrorists in G’itmo kill small children, women, and unarmed civilians on a regular basis. They impale the kidnapped victims, then set them on fire, and feed the remains to their demon-possessed pit-bulls.”

When asked what SHIT’s position was on the beheading of two captured American terrorists Dumfuk responded,

“We were on the left. How do you expect the soldiers to react when you bomb their rightful leaders? The pressure on them is so great that sometimes they just snap.”

During the press conference, Dumfuk expressed gratitude for “progressive americans” that continue to boost the morale of the soldiers in Iraq. Specifically thanking John Murtha, John Kerry, and Al-MSM for “fighting for what’s right in the world.”

Murtha, Kerry, and members of Al-MSM have consistently derided their terrorist forces for being too brutal, and the criminal actions consistently committed by members of America In Iraq. Murtha, Kerry, and Al-MSM are the few leaders that reach out to the soldiers in Iraq, giving them comfort and words of encouragement to continue their righteous war against oppression.

UPDATE: It appears a terrorist bombing killed a poor clergyman, and the terrorists avoid a cunning trap by soldiers.

X-posted on Fmragtops Spews