Political Humor | Congratulate Me on My Newfound Wealth!

Conservative Political Humor|Satire|Parody

Congratulate Me on My Newfound Wealth!

I just received an email notifying me that I’m now a multi-millionaire! This is fantastic news. Now I can do all the things that I always dreamed of doing. Here’s the text of the email from Raul Garcia:

Dear winner,

congratulations,this is from the office of the Euromillion international lottery promotion spain,i was directed to inform you that your e-mail address won in the second class of our draw and you open the attachment data of this mai l to see your letter of notification and for any question or to start your claim you contact your agent with the information below.

National trust Agency
Dr.Frank Dan iel
Address: Avda .Del Petroleo 222 Polig
Madrid Spain. E-mail: (national_trust@ozu.es)

Once again congratulations.
Best regard,
Mrs. Clara Fernandez
Lottery coordinator

I never imagined that I would just wake up one day and be rich, but here it is. I didn’t even know that I had been entered into a lottery, but the email doesn’t lie.

Now I can devote all my time and resources to making “teh funny,” and enjoying life.

UPDATE: I’ve just been elated all day long about this fantastic news. Now I won’t have to worry about shady sounding discount Mexican vacations. In fact, I’m going whole hog. I’m going to buy the top 5 floors of the most expensive hotel I can find, and you’re all coming with me – My treat. We’ll do the vacationing no Mexican will do, and we’ll do it in style!

More Political Humour by Radioactive Liberty

Category: Pointless Nonsense

21 Responses to “Congratulate Me on My Newfound Wealth!”

  1. Redneck says:

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    That’s nothing. A guy from Africa is going to let me help him launder millions from his own country. I’ve already sent him my banking information and am just waiting for the money to come pouring in.

    Sweet.

  2. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    So what ya gonna buy the Chief Mongress? Huh?

  3. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    YAY!!! A vacation!!!!

  4. Insolublog says:

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    Now you know how Carlos Slim really made his billions.

  5. jimmyb says:

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    Woo-hoo!!

    Par-tay!!!

  6. Wild Bill says:

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    I can teach you how to invest that money with my new eBook, How To Make A Million Dollars An Hour By Sitting On Your A$$! Right now I have a special price, $495.93 for the first 10 people that order this life changing eBook. And if you sign up 3 friends to my email news letter, Making Money On The Toilet you’ll get access to me with THREE personal 30 minute mentoring calls. This eBook will go up to $2,000 next week, so don’t delay, sit on your A$$ and make money today.

    P.S. I almost forgot to tell you how simple my system is. You can start making money in 10 seconds. How’s that for fast. You would have to be completely retarded to not take advantage of this once in a lifetime system. Don’t be retarded signup today!

  7. Wyatt Earp says:

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    Hey, since you’re loaded, can you lend me $100,000. I’m working on “5-Minute Abs!”

  8. Fiar says:

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    Yaro Starak, why are you calling yourself Wild Bill?

    Redneck That’s awesome! Congratulations.

    Insolublog World’s richest person FTW!

    RT, Jimmy Yay!

    Wyatt The minute the money is in the bank, the check is in the mail.

  9. Redneck says:

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    Are you saying Yaro’s a scam????///??/?questionmark/??

    Crap. I’ve got to cancel a couple credit cards. I’ll be back.

  10. miriam says:

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    Don’t forget your old friends when you get rich. Pass out a few quarters to them, show you’re still a man of the people.

    By the way, I am starting a new business and would like to let you in on the ground floor. Send $10,000 in cash or money order.

    Cashier’s check would be okay too.

  11. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    I only accept cash, in small bills.

  12. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    Wait. That didn’t sound good.

  13. Wyatt Earp says:

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    Heh. RT’s a pro. Bawahahahahahahahaha!!!

  14. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  15. Diesel says:

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    I’ll expect you to order at least a thousand copies of my book. You know, like the scientologists used to do with L. Ron Hubbard’s crap.

  16. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    Congratulations, that’s great! Of course, you could share a bit of the wealth. Many people have a donation button on there sites where you can make a contribution if you enjoy the material. Keep me in mind ;) .

  17. Fiar says:

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    Miriam, Wyatt, Diesel, and Priscilla I make the same promise. The moment the money is in the bank, the check is in the mail. Raul Garcia, a person I have no reason to believe is anything more than a spam script, is a man of his word.

    Redneck, Not at all. Your money is totally safe. It’s a great investment.

  18. Goldy says:

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    That’s so cool that you AND I won the same lottery! I’ll buy the hotel next door… all of it.

  19. Fiar says:

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    That’s fantastic, Goldy! It’s going to be awesome. We’re going to party like it’s… wait – Oh what the hell – Retro party! We’re going to party like it’s 1999.

  20. Redneck Rants Finally! « says:

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    [...] Finally! August 17th, 2007 — Redneck This is just one more piece of proof I’m way better than FIAR. He only got second place in the Euromillion international lottery. [...]

  21. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    [...] Suggested:Congratulate Me on My Newfound Wealth! 5 Surefire Ways to be More Unproductive The Lazy Man’s Guide to Making a Million Monetize Your Blog for Maximum Monetary Monetization of Your Money I Broke It You Bought It! [...]

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