I went to Staples at lunch today, because I wanted one of those “Easy” buttons. I saw how it made a fortress appear out of nowhere, and I thought it would be the perfect thing to put down my new hardwood floor, and finish the painting that I’m supposed to do. I thought it was just the thing I needed.
I realized that something like that probably wouldn’t be cheap, but I was prepared to pay a few hundred for such a useful item. I looked around for a while, and I didn’t see any of these “Easy” buttons, so I went to the front of the store, and asked the financial transaction specialist if they were out of stock, or where they were located.
I tell you, I was utterly shocked by what he told me. Sit down, you need to be ready for this. He told me that there are no easy buttons. It’s just a thing in their ads to convey the message that buying office supplies at Staples is easy. Well, I was outraged. If this isn’t the pinnacle of false advertising, I don’t know what is.
I want my money back, or at least I would if I had spent any. I think we should boycott Staples for this fraudulent and irresponsible advertising campaign. Contact the Better Business Bureau. Contact the Federal Trade Comission. Write your congressmen. Let our voices be heard that we will not stand for this kind of absolute disregard for the facts. Who’s with me?
**
Trackbacked on OTA Weekend Time, Wizbang

9 responses so far ↓
1
von
// Mar 14, 2006 at 12:27 am
You are wrong!!! I have one at work, and I will prove it tomorrow!
You are going to be soooo jealous!
2
fmragtops
// Mar 14, 2006 at 8:36 am
Down with the liars!
On a side note, I contacted Vault to see if they could sell me one of those hippy killing, robot, scarecrows, and they said it doesn’t exist. I was pissed! I feel your pain.
3
uber
// Mar 14, 2006 at 3:56 pm
I have a freind who has an easy button so I know they at least exist.
p.s. Not to jump to conclusions about von or anything, but I’d be hesitant about anyone who wants to show me their easy button (depending on who it is anyhow). *g*
4
von
// Mar 14, 2006 at 5:15 pm
Haha!!
5
FIAR
// Mar 14, 2006 at 7:00 pm
Good one Uber! BTW, can I show you MY easy button?
6
Mike
// Mar 14, 2006 at 9:55 pm
You mean there are no easy buttons? Where is all that money I’ve been paying toward lay-away going?
7
FIAR
// Mar 15, 2006 at 12:34 am
Allow me to clarify. There are FAKE easy buttons, but not the real kind that automatically do everything for you. Sorry Mike, but we Mikes are out of luck.
8
jimmyb
// Mar 15, 2006 at 10:36 am
My mom told me there was no easy button in life.
She was right.
Just like fitch!
9
von
// Mar 15, 2006 at 11:21 pm
Bah, the guy at work that has possesion of the easy button is on vacation, and his door is locked. What a shame. It was really going to be a funny joke… oh well.
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