Alex- I’m afraid that’s an old wives’ tale. In order for medication to spread throughout the body, you need to have A BEATING HEART to spread it, Robin Williams notwithstanding.

Chris- I really wish I still lived in California. I don’t much like it in New Jersey. But I guess I’m gonna have to stick up for it now. Sigh. Anyway, hmm. Let’s see. A good, snappy comeback about how great New Jersey is. Hmm. Um. Something clever.

HAH! Corn! Jersey corn! When you dry it out, it’s a great club to use on any undead creatures hanging around your front porch waiting for you to call the cat in! Yeah! Huh! Oh, yeah! Can ya feel that? Hoo!

I took the smart way out and decided to save my hour.
Next time I’m at a bar and they yell “closing time”, I’ll whip that puppy out and put it to good use.

See that’s why you should never ask someone from New Jersey about vampire problems. All those dirty needles on the beach created the damn problem in the first place!

It figures that the vampire epidemic started in Bayonne because they are the only ones who could tolerate the refinery smell.

Frogster- What has happened to civilisation… I’m truly hurt by your lack of sensitivity to the crypto-mythological members of our society. A simple dose of Ritalin can calm down any zombie/vampire/werewolf, and make them a valued asset to any party, look at what robin williams has accomplished now that its on proper meds.

Crap, it’s Tuesday (almost wednesday) already. I’ve lost 3 frickin days. Damn daylight savings time!

Chris- Let me put this in New Englandese for you. When I’ve bagged me a moose (I nevah said it was cow steak) and brought it out usin’ my foh wheelah, and I’m cookin’ it up, a bunch of bloodsuckahs lyin’ round under my grill gives me a wicked headache.

that’s not blood in red meat. It’s dye. Any vampire worth his/her salt would already know this.

Nice try though.

RT- One important difference between zombies and muppets is that when you poke a sharp stick into a muppet you don’t pull out a bunch of disgusting green wobbly bits.

Alex- Oh oh oh. And vampires are “platelet diminished,” and I suppose werewolves are “toothily overcompensated.” Puh-leeze. You people and your PC language. Why don’t you come on over the next time I’m grilling and see what it’s like to try to fend off the werewolves grabbing at the uncooked steak? And don’t even get me started about vampires lying under the grill open-mouthed waiting for the juicy drips.

If they won’t bother making the effort to get their own life, I don’t see why I need to make my life more complicated.

@Diesel- It was way more than an hour.

Look people can we get some perspective here, they prefer the term ‘life absent individual’, not Zombie. And they make up an important part of the community, call centre staff, Walmart greeters, etc etc, infact most of the service industry are zombies. Show them some respect!

The missing hour went where Mrs. Clinton’s billing records were. It will turn up on a table in 7 years.

Clearly Karl Rove is behind this!