By Flowers Bloom
I just finished watching the movie The Chronicles of Narnia, and I am appalled at the damage done by so few humans. It’s shocking to see the devastating effect that just four children bring to the world.
We have over six billion people inhabiting our Earth Mother, and it is no wonder that Gaia is rebelling with floods, hurricanes, tsunamis, and other natural disasters at her disposal.
First we see Lucy enter Narnia, and meet a charming faun named Mr. Tumnus. He plays beautiful music for her, unaware of the threat that she and her siblings pose to his beautiful land. Then her brother meets with the Queen and very greedily demands tasty treats from her. In spite of his crude manner, she complies with his wishes.
Finally, all four Pevensie children make their way to Narnia. We see a wintery paradise transformed into a sub-tropical wasteland at an astonishing rate. I could not beleive the speed with which global warming occured just based on the mere presence of 4 children.
Imagine what sort of damage would be done by billions of humans, and their gas guzzling SUVs. I’m sure that global warming would render Narnia uninhabitable in just days.
Even still, people refuse to acknowledge the very real threat of global warming. In just a short time the rivers and lakes began to melt. Within days, there was no more snow or ice at all. Plants sprouted, and flowers bloomed, which all seems wonderful and pretty to those of us who are used to such things, but the inhabitants of Narnia must have felt very frightened by the sudden warming trend.
The children invade this foreign land, and depose it’s rightful ruler. What makes them so arrogant as to think that the people of Narnia do not like the way that they live? They look at this different and strange land, and decide that they can make it better. What makes them the judge of what is better?
I find it all very apalling, even as we struggle with our own debate about the effects of global warming. Perhaps, Remulak MoxArgon should take heed. If supposedly “innocent” children can wreak such havok, how can he possibly think he stands a chance against billions of Earth Mother raping humans?
I think that perhaps the most frightening thing of all was that after laying waste to the now desolate Narnia, the children go back through the wardrobe, and return to the very moment at which they had initially entered.
Do they think to consider the unmitigated disaster they have left behind in the once frozen and beautiful Narnia? Most likely not. The movie doesn’t address this serious issue. It’s typical of human nature to leave behind the mess, and take no personal responsibility.
But what of the creatures of Narnia? They are left to fend for themselves, their land transformed, and their ruler deposed. Do the Pevensies care about them? Do you?
Related: Saving the World with Puppies and Kittens
Flowers and Hugs
Promoting Free Speech
Bloodthirsty Babykillers Slander Patriotic Americans
How You Can Help Save the Planet
More Satire.
2004–2008
16 responses so far ↓
1 fmragtops // May 31, 2006 at 6:56 pm
Uhhh, no. I don’t care about the creatures of Narnia. Hell, I barely care about the creatures of Earth. What, with the carribou of Alaska, and the fish of the Gulf oppressing so much oil. That oil needs to be free to be used for stealing oil from other countries.
2 FIAR // May 31, 2006 at 7:11 pm
Yeah, Flowers, and I think you might want to take note of the fact that Narnia is fictional.
3 basil // Jun 1, 2006 at 6:07 am
[...] Radioactive Liberty finds a global warming threat others have overlooked. [...]
4 Mike // Jun 1, 2006 at 3:59 pm
Say….do you suppose there is any oil in Narnia?
5 fmragtops // Jun 1, 2006 at 7:21 pm
We won’t know until we bomb it and find out.
6 Sssteve // Jun 2, 2006 at 10:48 am
Cool are going to Narnia next for Oil!! Whooo hooo!! We could take them!! I mean a couple of kids with swords as big as themselves did it!!
7 SeanS // Jun 4, 2006 at 2:36 pm
They have no weapons except swords.
They have no vehicles except wagons and sleds.
This is going to be sooooo easy. Muahahaha!
8 Flowers Bloom // Jun 4, 2006 at 3:21 pm
*Sigh*
No one ever listens to me. I bet now we’ll have FIAR writing a post about “War for Oil” in Narnia.
9 The Bullwinkle Blog » Blog Archive » Sunday Funnies // Jun 4, 2006 at 10:38 pm
[...] Funny Blog Posts: Blogs For House gives us House: The Clinic Hours. Commencement Day speeches are popular this time of year, as Greg Gutfield shows us. Soccer Dad shares with us Great Moments In Marital Bliss. Dr. Helen asks Is Marriage In Britian On The Rocks? Beautiful Atrocities showcases Madonna: Dare To Be Tired. Sexual Records clears up some Unusual Sex Terms. Overheard In New York tells us what it is That Really Gets My Goat. A Cynical Single Kuwaiti Woman highlights a Curmudgeon On A Power Trip. Blame Bush has a Movie Review; An Inconvenient Truth. Radioactive Liberty has Global Warming And Narnia. [...]
10 jimmyRRpage // Dec 2, 2006 at 1:52 am
No offense, but… this is either ajoke, or you are the dumbest person in existence. The whiole point of Narnia is that the Winter was the wasteland. The Queen was actually the White Witch, and was evil, and the rightful ruler was actually the Lion. The kids were supposed to sav eNarnia from the frozen wasteland.
So, please… tell me this is a joke. Please… if this is serious, then I am truly worried about the furtue of the human race.
11 jimmyRRpage // Dec 2, 2006 at 1:53 am
Please forgive my typos…
People who speak english as a second language type it better than I do, and it’s my native language…
12 Promoting Free Speech - Updated! — Radioactive Liberty // Aug 2, 2007 at 10:39 pm
[...] with Puppies and Kittens Flowers and Hugs Bloodthirsty Babykillers Slander Patriotic Americans Global Warming and Narnia How You Can Help Save the [...]
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