Steve the Pirate informs us that, rather than accept public asssistance, he has aquired employment at a local grocery store. At first, I thought, “Aha! Gotcha! You’re finally feeling the pinch of the worst economy since Herbert Hoover was President, aren’t you, Steve?”

We’ll it turn out that this job is not his primary employment. No. Can you beleive this? He has two jobs. That’s right, it’s a second job.

I cry foul, Steve. Don’t you realize that employment is a zero sum game, and you’re taking on two jobs when so many poor, unfortunate Americans have no job at all. That is not fair. That is not fair at all.

It’s clear that you are just a heartless, cruel, evil conservative. Indeed. Taking a job that a less fortunate person may need. Oh, sure, you want your shiny new computer, but someone else, somewhere, needs to eat, and can’t because you have deprived him of the possibility of employment.

My laptop has a broken hinge, but you don’t see me taking a second job, because I have a heart. I want to leave that job open and acailable for someone who needs it. It has nothing to do with being too lazy to work longer hours. You heartless, SOB.

Category: Humor