There’s something seriously wrong with our immigration policies, as I will demonstrate with fake, but accurate accounts.

To Whom it may concern:

I am a 36 year old computer network engineer from Birmingham England. I would like to apply for American citizenship.

Sincerely,

Stephen Kingsley

7 Years Later

Mr. Kingsley

Thank you for your interest in becoming an American Citizen. We regret to inform you that your request has been denied.

Meanwile, at a bureacratic office somewhere in America

“Hello, My name is Miguel Ortiz. I have been in your country illegally for 7 years now, and I would like to become a citizen.”

“Done and Done.”

““Pardon me. Do I have to fill out an application or something?”

“Look down. It’s already stamped ‘Approved.’”

In Canada, Ibrahim Ali bin Muhammed and his friends are nearing the U.S. Border.

(Translated) “Just a few more steps, and we will be in the United States.”

“Then what do we do?”

“We tell them that we are survivors of the Taliban, and get a free education at Yale, where we will learn to creat computer viruses, and learn about nuclear fusion, and rocket science to build ICBMs. Aren’t the infidels so wonderfully stupid?”

“Yes, Praise be Allah.”

**

Trackbacked on Mudville Gazette

Tags Immigration, border, Security

Category: Politics [Yawn]