Mongering Ain’t Easy

November 2nd, 2006 by Fiar · 30 Comments ·

You know, being a hatemonger is hard work. I slave tirelessly, night and day to bring you the most offensive and reprehensible content that I can, and it just never seems to be enough. I wish I had more time to comment on the blogs of others, but I know spewing my seething hatred down the throat of the world is my calling, and I dutifully answer that call.

I think most people don’t understand what a strain on me it is to be so riddled with hate all the time. They don’t know about the migraines, and the back pain. Yes, hatemongering takes a physical, as well as psychological toll.

I don’t think it’s fair to say that I hate being a hatemonger. It’s who I am, after all, but just know that I do this for you, and for America. Every visit to Radioactive Liberty foils a terrorist plot somewhere, or kills a terrorist dead. I’m doing my part to keep America safe. Every comment is a defeat for the Democrats, and since we know that the Democrats are flagrant supporters of terrorism, every comment is a knife in the heart of terrorism as well.

People suck. Think about how many people there are in America alone. Over 300 million, and yet, how many care that they are supporting terrorism by not paying their daily visit to Radioactive Liberty? You loyal readers are true patriots, but everyone else has earned every bit of scorn and contempt I vomit in their direction.

I annihilate the lines of decency and respect so you don’t have to. No matter what you say, you will always have an out, whether it be, “FIAR started it,” or, “If you think that’s bad, you should see what FIAR said.” Either way, you can sleep soundly at night knowing that I am more of a reprobate than you are. You can look in the mirror knowing that at least you haven’t sunk as low as I have.

I’m doing my part to protect America. Are you?

Tags: Humor ·

30 responses so far ↓

1 von // Nov 2, 2006 at 5:16 pm

I hate this post! This post is stupid!

Hows that? I’m trying to be more like you.
2 fmragtops // Nov 2, 2006 at 5:35 pm

Oh captain, my captain! You suck! I hope your boat sinks and you drown!

Just doing my small part to defeat democrats, and by default, terrorists.
3 fmragtops // Nov 2, 2006 at 5:36 pm

Oh, and there is an ongoing flame-war at Shoot A Liberal if you care to join in. I better go tell Dr. Phat Tony. He got mad when we didn’t tell him about the last one.
4 Passionate America » Passionate Links and Open Trackback 11/02/2006 // Nov 2, 2006 at 5:42 pm

[...] FIAR says Mongering Ain’t Easy! Indeed [...]
5 richj // Nov 2, 2006 at 5:51 pm

I hate your hatemonger-mongering. Hatemonger!
6 Skul // Nov 2, 2006 at 7:59 pm

What is this? You trying to be a warm and fuzzy beaver-kissing-monger? I condemn your flip-flopping-mongerizm.
7 fmragtops // Nov 2, 2006 at 8:14 pm

I AM a beaver-kissing-monger!
8 RT // Nov 2, 2006 at 10:27 pm

Beaver-mongering? Maybe I have a one-track mind.

Keep spewing hate and I will do my best to support the hate by visiting and leaving dumb comments…not spam.
9 FIAR // Nov 2, 2006 at 11:15 pm

I will keep spewing the hate to protect the American dream of unlimited bacon and 12 cent/gallon gasoline.
10 RT // Nov 3, 2006 at 12:33 am

I remember my mom ordering $3 worth of gas and just about filling up the Rambler. Damn.
11 LittleOrangeFox // Nov 3, 2006 at 1:53 am

Your are a mongering monger.

The worst kind, I hear.
12 von // Nov 3, 2006 at 7:17 am

I hate your jokes, they are so funny.
13 jt // Nov 3, 2006 at 8:54 am

Poop!
14 fmragtops // Nov 3, 2006 at 9:44 am

No JT, we’ve already stolen our battlecry from you, and it’s: BACON!!!!
15 jt // Nov 3, 2006 at 10:22 am

That’s what I meant to type.

It was a botched joke.

It wasn’t my fault.

It was yours.

Bacon!!!
16 FIAR // Nov 3, 2006 at 11:08 am

It’s not JT’s fault you are too stupid to know what he meant, and he will NOT apologize for YOUR stupidity.
17 fmragtops // Nov 3, 2006 at 11:25 am

You know, education, if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don’t, you say poop when you meant to say BACON.
18 von // Nov 3, 2006 at 1:56 pm

POOPY BACON!1!
19 jimmyb // Nov 3, 2006 at 2:21 pm

Of course I’m doing my part.
I’m here aren’t I?

It would indeed be ironic if you did hate being a hate monger.

And saying poopy bacon is sacralige, btw.
Turning bacon into poop the old-fashioned way is ok, however.
20 fmragtops // Nov 3, 2006 at 2:53 pm

So that would be BACON POOP, then?
21 Skul // Nov 3, 2006 at 3:15 pm

fm, Eew. I wonder if that would make your mongeroids bleed? Is there a treatment for such a condition?
Von, you’re a potty mouth to say that. Go wash your mouth with lard.
22 Sssteve // Nov 3, 2006 at 8:27 pm

Your all a bunch of Poopy bacon Mongers!!! You guys suck and I hate all of you!! May all you children turn out to be democrats!! I HATE YOU!\1\

did i do good?

btw I agree with jimmy boy, no sacrelege of bacon, you must worship bacon and eat it!!
23 RT // Nov 3, 2006 at 11:43 pm

I hate hate. I think.
24 Hawk // Nov 5, 2006 at 9:42 pm

I just got sent to this site a couple of days ago and I hate you already…

Is that the way this thing works? lol

MORE BEAVERMONGERING!!

and someone pass the bacon, please?
25 FIAR // Nov 6, 2006 at 11:19 am

Hawk, well played! Well played indeed.
26 fmragtops // Nov 6, 2006 at 12:39 pm

Yes, hawk, you will make a fine addition to our monger horde.
27 jt // Nov 7, 2006 at 12:54 pm

I hate you Hawk, you well playing monger…
28 jt // Nov 7, 2006 at 12:56 pm

And, oh yeah…welcome to the horde…
29 Radioactive Liberty - Useless. Worthless. Pointless. » Dance Monkey! // Jul 11, 2007 at 8:01 pm

[...] Mongering Ain’t Easy I Think You’ll Agree With My Disagreeing With Agreeing to Disagree This entry is filed [...]
30 Passionate Links and Open Trackback 11/02/2006 — Passionate America // Jul 28, 2007 at 5:06 pm

[...] says Mongering Ain’t Easy! [...]

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