My Political Humor Christmas Wish List
Just like this past Thanksgiving, Les and Fiar ran out the door leaving me to create a post on one of the biggest holidays of the year, Christmas.
I’m not even getting paid to do this.
[Chris shakes fist at sky]
Oh wait, Fiar left his liquor cabinet open again. Oooh Southern Comfort and Wild Turkey? You shouldn’t have. Merry Christmas me. Now where are those shot glasses?
Now that I have thrown back a few shots I am going to do something I rarely do: a blog bandwagon-type post, specifically a wish list. Here we go.
Fiar: A pet hippie you can beat whenever you like. Since moonbats think humans are the root of all evil in the happy magical land of Gaia then isn’t Fiar simply helping them reach their goal with repeated beatings of said smelly 60′s left-overs? Buy a friend the gift of a pet hippie and you will achieve . You will.
Les: You get the gift of picking out the pet hippie for Fiar. Take your time though there are so many good ones to choose from. Make sure the pick is housebroken too if you can.
JumpOut: What else? The best Taser money can buy. I’ll go on to someone else as you are probably anxious to try your new toy out on some unsuspecting moonbats.
Barack Obama: Your real birth certificate. Now you can shut up all these idiots who think you are not a US citizen. I don’t know why they continue on with this madness. You will find ways to f^^k things up all by yourself without any help from the right-wing moonbats and their conspiracies. I have the utmost faith in you Barack to fail on your own merits.
AGW Believers (The Global Warming people): The complete DVD set of Little House on the Prairie. Since this was the last time humans used wind, solar, and water power pretty much exclusively it would be a great guide on how to live in the future.
Massachusetts Voters: The new movie Taxachusetts II: This Time We’re Taking All of It. By voting 70-30% in favor of keeping the state income tax, you have told your political leaders that you are in favor of being taxed at will. Good luck with that.
Gay People Offended By The Pope’s Remarks On Gender Roles: A reality check. Were you expecting him to say something favorable to your cause? He’s the Pope. If anything you should laugh at his remarks as they came a good six weeks after the hype that would have gotten him more press coverage. Plus, he picked one of the slowest news days of the year to make his comments. No worries.
Merry Christmas everyone, Happy Hanukkah, well wishes for any other way you celebrate this time of year. Enjoy the day and safe travels.
Chris Cameron writes this weekly column every Thursday here at RadioactiveLiberty. He also has his own humor blog Angry Seafood.
More Christmas Humor:
* Obama Night Before Christmas Parody
* Holiday Gift Ideas
* Does Santa Claus Hate the Jews?
* 12 Days of Christmas Parody
* Democrats Should Run the North Pole
Category: Political Humor Tags: Christmas, Humour, Political Humor, Wish List
2004–2012
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Thanks Chris, I’ll get right on that, except it’s snowing here and all the hippies around these parts have migrated south for the winter. Which is why they think solar power is a year ’round source of power. Fiar, it may take me a while to get a good one.
Merry Christmas to you all and may all your hippie beating wishes come true.
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A pet hippie? I don’t have to feed the damn thing, do I?
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Don’t worry about feeding your pet hippie. Since they’re all about eating organic, I’m sure you could just feed them a turd, and they’ll be okay with it.
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No need to even feed a hippie. They are in abundance so if your pet hippie dies you can just get a new one.
Even with the retirement of the first generation of moonbats soon I have a feeling there will always be hippies ready to be domesticated.
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I can’t wait to read about which hippie Les picked and how Fiar is doing with his new pet.
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Hint, hint.
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Yes, hint hint indeed. I gave you two a nice gift of future content material that has a lot of mileage.
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Is a hippie pet the same as a chia pet?
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No. You have to water a chia pet. Hippies are alergic to water, and the reactions are twice as severe if soap is near the water.
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See, the hippies have that green leafy stuff growing on them, so I thought they were the same.
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[...] what has to be the oddest gift exchange I’ve ever been involved with, Chris C decided that I would get zip while demanding that I [...]
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[...] friend gave me a pet hippie for Christmas. At first I was very enthusiastic about my gift. I was going to hang it upside down in my shed and [...]