A: Both of their careers died with pants around the ankles.
Some of you may have heard that Michael Jackson died yesterday, thus ending his career too. But unlike Elvis, you almost never see a troop of Michael Jackson impersonators (Although it could be argued that Jackson was a bad impersonation of himself) And if you did find one, I wouldn’t hire him for a kid’s birthday party. Well, Jackson’s death might bring the financially strapped family some money in the form of movie and TV rights. I’d like to suggest a title for a movie, MJ: The Pedo File.
I’m waiting for Congress to vote for a bail-out for the Jackson Estate. It’s been estimated that he owes between 400 to 500 million dollars to various banks. Is the Kink Of Poptoo big to fail? We’ll have to wait to see. I can hear Obama saying that he doesn’t want to run the Michael Jackson Estate.
Elvis is known as The King, Jackson as The King of Pop, and Sanford was looking to the 2012 Presidential elections. He was The Man Who Would Be King. Coincidence?
So, Governor Sanford’s and Jackson’s and Elvis’ careers are dead. Sanford’s just doesn’t have the grace to go to room temperature. Instead Sanford has decided to take a page out of the Obama Version of the Democrat Play Book. He’s going on an apology tour. Politics and monkeys sure make strange bedfellows.
In related news: Michael Jackson has just been spotted at a gas station in Memphis.
This week’s edition of Political Humor Quick Hits is about UN sanctions, a new Barack Obama video, a new Guevara revolution, and Democrat pirates…
I Cannot Understand Why UN Sanctions Are Not Effective
So a ship from North Korea is bound for Myanmmar with alleged banned small arms cargo. Do not worry though because the UN has the rules in place to deal with this situation:
“The Security Council resolution calls on all 192 U.N. member states to inspect North Korean vessels on the high seas “if they have information that provides reasonable grounds to believe that the cargo” contains banned weapons or material to make them. But that requires approval from the North.”
192 nations signed off on this? Did Johnnie Cochrane come back from the dead to lead the lawyers on the deal?
This is like the episode of Seinfeld where Jerry rips on the rental car company for taking the reservation while at the same time not being able to hold the reservation.
Pirates Were Really Democrats
This is a good one:
“Pirates have been long maligned and cursed as thieves and sea dogs, but according to one economist they formed vanguard capitalist democracies, with constitutions, elections and healthcare plans…
…The economics professor at George Mason University outside the US capital, says he has found evidence that some 18th century pirates wrote down rules and principles which foreshadowed the US Constitution by decades.
“We have three or four surviving accounts of pirate constitutions,” Peter Leeson said”
In the world of liberals three or four examples always prove something.
This is like when only a handful of the tens of thousands of glaciers in the world are actually being studied and researched, yet all of them are melting.
A funny thing happened on the way to real history however: 20% of our country’s revenues in 1800 went to paying off the Barbary pirates in North Africa. We even gave them ships to use for piracy, thanks in large part to Thomas Jefferson.
The only difference between the “Democrat” pirates of the 1700’s and the ones in Congress is who they are fleecing- us instead of our ancestors.
Lydia Guevara poses semi-nude in a PETA campaign that tells viewers to “join the vegetarian revolution,” said PETA spokesman Michael McGraw.
In the ad, Lydia Guevara wears camouflage pants, a red beret, and bandoliers of baby carrots while standing with one fist on her hip and the other outstretched.
“It very much evokes the tag line of the ad, which is ‘Join the vegetarian revolution,’” McGraw said. “It’s an homage of sorts to her late grandfather.”
I seem to recall that the last time a Guevara family member led a revolution a lot of people died. PETA knows no boundaries when it comes to a homage that is for sure.
So remember folks, if you don’t go vegetarian you will be killed for your indiscretion!
Political Humor Quick Hits is a weekly commentary on the news/current events written by Chris Cameron every Tuesday. You can also read his other weekly column here every week as well as his own humor blog Angry Seafood.
2004–2009