Political Humor | SAST #2 [Short Attention Span Topics]

I’m feeling a bit scatterbrained today, so I think I’ll just bring another installment of Short Attention Span Topics.

People seem to think that I’m some sort of expert on how to remove pubic har. Before you proceed, please, go no further. Now there are several methods for removing pubic hair, all of them effective to some degree, but pubic har is one of the deadliest substances known to man. It should only be romoved by a qualified, trained, and certified professional, and even then, using all necessary safety equipment and procedures. I cannot emphasize this enough.

The Anti-Hippie links to what might possibly be the most important video you have ever seen. If you have not yet seen it, go now. It just might save your life.

JT declares War on the Spammers. Help him in his crusade to… uh… er… Write funny posts about spam. Yeah, that’s it.

Now, people are always asking me about impaling babies. I think we need to set this straight one more time. Impaling babies is strictly reserved for when we run out of dirty hippies to impale, and that will never happen… Unfortunately.

There’s still no War for Oil yet, Dammit! And it also looks like we didn’t beat the everloving crap out of Zarqawi before he died. Dammit again.

The Blue Square has found a new home where he will be all order-y and blue-y and square-y. It’s also likely that “tenets” will be involved. I don’t know how much rent they pay, but… Anyhoo, now if he could just get some reader participation.

There is some good news and some bad news in the War on Terror. The good news is that a few Jihadis saved a few taxpayer dollars and killed themselves. The bad news is that there’s still no ties between al Qaeda and Iraq.

I’m not a Doctor, but I play one at Blogs for House, which must be why people are also seeking my advice on how to amputate a finger. Personally I prefer to use anesthesia, and a very sharp scalpel, but some people just enjoy the pain.

Speaking of which, unfortunately we have recently lost an expert on the amputation of heads. He preferred a ‘no anesthesia’ method, coupled with a dull cutting object. Mr. Berg asked me to post his favorite picture of the kind gentleman with his son.

Michael Berg always says, when he sees that picture, it reminds him of all the good times he and Zarqawi had together. He also said that Zarqawi’s death is a loss from which he will never quite recover.

**

Trackbacked on Mudville Gazette