?egnahC: A Vision of the Apocalypse

And then on the fourth day, teh Messiah had risen to power set to reign for four years, and he brought with him the minions and ghouls of the Underworld known as Congress. And Lo the most merciful Lord Obama sent out the Whore of the Bay whose face was stretched in hideous, and terrifying fashion. With her she carried four seals.

And when the Ghoulosi opened the first seal the Earth beheld a white horse. His rider is always right, and he was given a satirical bow and crown. He was given the power of conquering, and to conquer small, oil rich countries, and the blogosphere. He rode forth and trampled many hippies, and moonbats beneath the white horse’s jackboots.

And ye then did she open the second seal, and the earth beheld a red horse. Power was given unto it’s rider to distort the images of the web, to make them attack those that may be in them. A great sword of humor and satire was given unto him that those who did not find his work funny would laugh anyway.

When the Whore opened the third seal, there emerged a black horse. The rider carried with him a pair of balances. Ghoulosi said unto him a measure of satire for a penny, and three measures of humor for a penny. The rider replied,”You mean I get paid for this? Sweet!” to which the whore replied, “We get it all back in taxes, but take with you this Angry Seafood to unleash upon the earth.”

The fourth seal was then opened, and behold a pale horse. His rider’s name was JumpOut and humor and satire followed with him. And power was given unto them to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth. Hilarity ensued.

I’m here bitches, tremble.

Image Credit: March of the Undead by Lainmoon

Category: Humor · Self Aggrandizement Tags: 2008 Election, Apocalypse, Brackalypse, Congress, Democrat Humor, Humor, Pelosi, Political Humor, Satire, The Four Horsemen