Brothers Adham Othman, 21, and Louai Othman, 23, and their cousin Maruan Muhareb, 18, may have cracked a capitalist code that has long been shrouded in mystery. These resourceful Texans recently uncovered the missing step of the profiteering model first engineered by the Underpants Gnomes. The Underpants Gnomes are renowned as being responsible for mysteriously missing underpants.

This, of course, is all part of the brilliant plan they devised to amass great wealth. The profit model used by the Underpants Gnomes has long had an unknown second step.

1. Collect underpants
2. ???
3. Profit

We now learn, via Detroit Free Press, that these three enterprising graduates of the Palestinian Institute of Technology found that by moving from the underpants market to the disposable cell phone industry, an important second step could be implemented.

1. Buy cell phones at Wal-Mart
2. Remove the batteries and Chargers
3. Profit

A Wal-Mart employee, obviously not as entrepreneurial as the three Texan venture capitalists, was suspicious of the mass cell phone purchase, and contacted authorities.

But relatives of the Texas men said they’re innocent entrepreneurs buying phones cheaply at discount stores, then selling them at a profit.

“There may be a language barrier here,” said one official, speaking on condition of anonymity because of the ongoing investigation. “It’s possible that they planned to use the phones for ‘The Prophet,’ instead of ‘a profit,’” he told reporters.

Wal-Mart officials have declined to comment.

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Category: Caustic Sarcasm