Political Humor | Spitzer Officially Resigns as NY Governor

Spitzer Swallows

Eliot Spitzer officially resigned from the office of New York Governor Wednesday morning. In a Manhattan press conference he made his public apology and announced his resignation.

Over the course of my public life, I have insisted — I believe correctly — that people regardless of their position or power take responsibility for their conduct,. I can and will ask no less of myself. For this reason, I am resigning from the office of governor

Spitzer was alleged to have been involved with a high priced escort service, called the Emperor’s Club.

For weeks before the scandal broke, the FBI had been conducting surveillance at the Mayflower Hotel in unsuccessful attempts to catch Spitzer. The alleged “Client number 9” triggered the investigation when the Treasury Department decided to take a deeper look into some suspicious activities of the Governor’s bank account. Further investigation revealed that money was being transferred to shell companies associated with the Emperor’s Club Escort service.

Spitzer’s resignation will take effect Monday, March 17. At that point Lt. Gov. David Patterson will be sworn in before a joint session of the NY State Legislature. Lt. Gov. Patterson will be New York’s first black Governor.

Spitzer Makes Quick Exit

I just can’t believe that he was so quick to resign. In less than 48 hours after being linked to the Federal Investigation, Spitzer called it quits. Haven’t we learned anything from President Bill Clinton. In fact, if I were Spitzer, I would have hired Clinton as an adviser.

Eliot: Hey, Bill. You were caught banging interns, and were able to remain the President of the United States. How did you do it?

Bill: Deny. Deny. Deny. When they ask you if you were involved, you just look at the camera and say:

You see, Elliot, it all just depends on what your definition of “is” is.

Eliot: Right. So it wouldn’t be a lie, because I never came on her face.

Bill: Exactly. And you never did any coke.

Eliot: That depends on what your definition of “is” is.

Bill: You’re a fast learner my friend.

Eliot: Thanks, Bill. You’re the best.

Spitzer Scandal is a Comedy Gold Rush

This sort of scandal is almost like the Holy Grail of parody and satire. A high ranking political official makes a name for himself as a tough-on-crime prosecutor. He gets elected Governor, promising to clean out the corruption. Then, the grande finale.

Spitzer gets caught with his pants down. He got his hand caught in the cookie jar. He got his Harry Potter caught in the sorcerer’s stone.

Shame on you, Eliot

Shame on you. Not for hiring high priced hookers and being a corrupt, hypocritical politician. But for being ungenerous. Spitzer was selfish. He didn’t stick it out. He pulled out too soon.

In the end, Eliot Spitzer has done a great disservice to the political humor writing community. For that, we will make him pay.

Humor-Blogs.com is the first black governor of parody.