Political Humor |

In the Oval Office. Wednesday January 27, 2010. Just before the State of the Union Address which is scheduled to begin at 9pm Eastern time.

An advisor goes over some of the last remaining business of the day with President Obama.

What should we do about the earthquake that devastated Haiti, Mr. President?

We’ll have to investigate what role Climate Change played in this catastrophe. Assemble a bipartisan committee to research this troublesome matter.

But, Mr. President, What if Global Warming — I mean “Climate Change” had nothing to do with the earthquake?

Come now, you can twist statistics and data to support anything, especially with the right funding, if you know what I mean.

Of course, sir. Government grants can certainly inspire hope, and CHANGE of relevant data when there are threats of withdrawing next year’s grants.

It wasn’t necessary to explain to me what *I* meant.

Of course not, Mr. President. I was just noticing that bucket in the corner and was concerned that you might get your head stuck in it. I was thinking that I should call maintenance and have it removed.

What bucket?

That one over there, Mr. President.

I see no problem with that bucket. I’m quite certain that there is no possibility of it getting stuck. Look. I’ll prove it to you.

No! Mr. President. Dammit! Too late.

See. I told you it wouldn’t get stuck. It comes right… Uh. See you just lift it. Maybe if you just wiggle a little as you lift, then that will… No. Give me hand here. I wouldn’t want to say that this bucket is stuck on my head, but I think an extra pair of hands might just do the trick.

It’s not coming off Mr. President. I think it’s stuck.

No. Just jostle it side to side as you pull. It will pop right off then.

Still not working. I’m pretty certain that it’s stuck. I never should have mentioned it. I know you have a knack for doing these sort of things.

We need to get this off. I have a State of the Union Address coming up and I need to consult the Mighty TelePrompter as to what my postitions are on a few issues. I don’t know where I stand yet. There’s no time!

Maybe Jack Bauer can help. He’s always good in a pinch.

He’s not real you idiot. Get this damn bucket off my head before I have to go live!

A voice came over the PA. “…The man with the plan. He brought Hope. He brought Change. Ladies and gentlemen. Let me present to you, The President of the United States. BaaaaaaaaaaaaRack OoooooooBaaaaaaaaaaamaaaaaaaaaa!”

You’re just going to have to go out there with a bucket on your head sir. I’m sorry.

Yeah. Me too.