Although there is a definite politically conservative slant to this site, we mostly take a viewpoint that politics and politicians suck in general. This weekly feature is designed to make a little fun of the political discourse throughout the rest of the week, by taking an absurd position over an equally absurd topic.
In keeping with the tradition of this flame war parody, pick a side, and be just a little (or a lot) too partisan about your position.
This week’s topic:
What inflicts more pain on dirty hippies: punching them in the face, or driving through their zen rock garden with an SUV?
Discuss.
2004–2008
10 responses so far ↓
1 Les James // Apr 27, 2008 at 11:11 am
Is the SUV a hybrid?
2 Les James // Apr 27, 2008 at 1:08 pm
On second thought, it doesn’t matter.
1. Drive slowly towards the rock garden.
2. Make sure the hippies have time to get in front to try to stop you.
3. Gun it!
4. Kill two (or more if you’re lucky) birds with one stone, and you didn’t actually have to touch a dirty hippie with your fist.
3 Fiar // Apr 27, 2008 at 4:19 pm
Hmm, Not too different from your drive by slapping idea.
It might not look like it, but I made changes to the theme. Please let me know if anything looks bizarre all of a sudden.
4 Les James // Apr 27, 2008 at 5:21 pm
Looks good to me.
Sorry I couldn’t get back sooner, I was out drive through the local sandboxes in my Hummer.
I had to take it throuh the car wash twice to get the smell of incense off. On the up side, the Hummer is now nicely lubed!
5 RT // Apr 27, 2008 at 5:40 pm
I wish I’d seen this before my trip to the hippie grocery store. I could have done a comparison and reported back to you. Dangit.
Rocks are people, too, so I guess they’d be more pained over the loss of some rocks.
6 Chris C // Apr 27, 2008 at 6:50 pm
How many times do I get to punch them in the face and how many times do I get to drive through their garden?
7 Fiar // Apr 27, 2008 at 8:28 pm
That’s entirely up to you, Chris. It’s a judgment call.
8 Chris C // Apr 27, 2008 at 8:55 pm
I think it is important to know these things because it completely changes my opinion.
Like if we get two punches but only one time over the rock garden or maybe three punches but six times driving over the rock garden.
Just because a situation is hypothetical doesn’t mean there shouldn’t be boundaries. Like what happens if the hippie is such a wimp that two punches takes him out but I still have another two left? Do I get to punch another hippie two more times?
Damn, without this important information how can I input the information into my computer models to determine the future outcomes?
9 Fiar // Apr 27, 2008 at 10:48 pm
Like what happens if the hippie is such a wimp that two punches takes him out but I still have another two left? Do I get to punch another hippie two more times?
Well of course you do. Do you think we’re not going to let you get your money’s worth?
10 Alex L // Apr 28, 2008 at 12:16 am
Well I think its more up to the person doing the driving/punching… do they value physical or emotional pain more.
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