Political Humor

Since an extra numeral of the date will change in a few hours, society obligates me to acknowledge this arbitrary time tracking system by posting a roundup of the best political humor of the last 365 solar cycles.

Before I proceed, I want to talk about your favorite subject — Me.

Lately, I’ve been required to do a lot of driving a forklift. If you’ve never driven a forklift, you might not have any idea just how different it is from driving a car. When you are driving a car and you turn the wheel hard to the left and then let go of the wheel, the car straightens out on it’s own. If you wanted to straighten out on a forklift, you would have to turn hard right in order to go straight again.

We’ve turned so far left in this country that we’re going to have to spin five turns to the right just to get going down the center again.

The best posts of 2009 are determined by random drawing. No. That isn’t right. Popularity as determined by Google Analytics will be the judge, so if you don’t like the order, complain to Google. Then beat a hippie. It will make you feel better. They may even have a few at Google.

Sadly, I realized the top 6 posts of 2009, by page view, are from either 2007 or 2008. Actually, most of the top 40 were from previous years. Political Humor is the gift that keeps on giving. As a result, I have unilaterally disqualified anything not published in 2009.

The Most Popular Political Humor Posts of 2009

11. Chris offers some Tips on Avoiding Swine Flu to begin the countdown. What, you thought this would be a top TEN list? We go against the grain here at RadioactiveLiberty.com. That’s what makes us the best.

10. The number ten entry seems to be an advertisement of some sort, but looks can be deceiving. Look a little closer and you will notice Economic Stimulus Funny Pictures by Les James.

9. The 2009 Summer Blockbuster movies came and went. They Call Me Senator Boxer was a favorite of Les James while I was partial to The World According to Gore. I like comedy. Especially the ones with inept fat guys.

One time I read some advice that if you want to have interested readers, you should talk about them. I think this advice sounds stupid and ridiculous, but since the year is almost over, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to give it a go. If it does, I’ll just beat a hippie, and that will surely make me feel better.

Did you ever think about how metaphors sometimes are more accurate than we give credit for? Did you ever have an idea in the back of your mind? If you were to go into a cat scan it would show activity in the back region of the brain. Do you get sick and tired of things? Do you notice if you frequently suffer illness? What might happen if you got fed up instead? You might lose some weight.

Enough about you. You’re boring and tedious to write about. Back to the list.

8. If you remember Jumpout (We miss you man. Come back), He televised a steel cage match between Rush Limbaugh and Obama. It was very entertaining.

7. President Obama offers some sage advice about work from home business job opportunities.

6. Les James introduced a line of political humor merchandise in 2009. Obama Coins are out, RL Gear is here. Speaking of merchandise…

For the naysayers, those who would not believe that it was possible to make money writing political humor, You can now have your crow and eat it too. This site has turned into a literal funnel of cash, raking in money hand over fist for a whopping sum of $79.24. That’s nearly enough to pay for the hosting, which will be due in February. Think about that. I wrote – what – 3 posts or something like that this year and made a cool 80 bucks. I am seriously considering giving Les and Chris a 50% raise. Merry Christmas.

5. Teabaggers and teaparties and Glenn Beck, Oh My! The 9-12 March on Washington Pictures.

4. In the fourth position, we find out what Obama would do to save money.

What would Obama do? Sorry Les and Chris, a raise will just put you in a higher tax bracket. I cannot in good conscience allow you to be punished for your achievement, so I’m cutting your pay by 50% to save money. Don’t blame me. It’s what Obama would do.

3. The second runner up is actually named to be a runner up. Penultimately Bad Obama Jokes and Funny Pictures captures the bronze.

2. Aptly, number two, has to do with a giant pile of crap, as advertised by on of this year’s untimely deaths, Billy Mays. Billy Mays, Obama Amazing TV Offer.

Speaking of piles of crap, 2009 heralded the new Obama plan for Hope in Afghanistan. The Obama plan calls for the US to hope in one cargo plane and shit in the other. As soon as the planes are full, they will fly over Afghanistan and drop their load. Personally, I think it’s a good plan, because I know which plane will fill up first. The question is, will the people of Afghanistan notice a difference?

1. The number one political humor post of 2009 is by our licensed doctor of photoshoptography, Les James. Potty humor rules the day with the Smell of Economic recovery. That’s how we roll here at RL.

If nothing else, 2009 had it’s ups. It had it’s downs. It had it’s atrocious cliches. It had a missing owner to a popular website. In summary and as a fitting epitaph, I will leave you with this: As I heard a wise man once say, “the best thing about the past is that it’s over.”

Goodbye 2009. And good riddance.

Happy New Year!

Want an Official Obama plate to hang on your wall? Or how about a few of those coins with the Certificate of Authenticity but you don’t want to pay an arm and a leg for them? Or maybe you just want something unique in the way of Obama-ploitation mementos? Have we got the perfect keepsake for you.

Hi, I’m Billy Mays. I’ve promoted a lot of wonderful products in my time but I’ve never seen anything like this. Image owning a piece of history that you’ll be proud to display on you mantle. Think of what you friends will say, when they see that you have your very own bit of Obama.

Obama-mania is sweeping the nation. But many of these products are limited to short runs and will simply disappear in the next few months. And once they’re gone, they’re gone!

DemTools is very happy to announce that they have reached an exclusive agreement with our new President, for a phenomenal collectible that you can keep on collecting.

What makes this such a national treasure you ask? That’s simple. Like any good renewable resource, this one is very abundant and has little impact on the environment. What could this delightful product be?

It’s the amazing Barack BM, and we won’t be running out any time soon.

Over the course of 8-10 years, the average person poos 2927-4212 times, but not our new President. He’s full of it, and want’s to spread the wealth. Best of all, the more he spreads it, the deeper it gets. Isn’t that fantastic?

We expect at least 20 times the crap from him as compared to any other President in living memory. Matter of fact, every deposit is so large, we divide it up into hundreds of smaller souvenirs. So there’s plenty to go around.

Watch this. Ordinary human excrement is soft and smells bad. [Squishes some in his hand] Wow, that’s nasty!

But not the amazing Barack BM. It’s tough as nails. [Bangs it loudly on the table] Would you do this with a regular bowel movement? [Holds to nose] and Barack BM doesn’t stink! That’s incredible!

After repeated washings, Barack BM still looks as fresh as the day it was made. It’s completely lead free, you can let you kids play with it. Non-toxic, organic and is bio-degradable, it makes the perfect gift.

Best of all, it comes with a Statement of Ingredients; you’ll know just what’s in each pile.

Here’s a testimonial from a satisfied customer. It’s from Mikey, a 9 year old boy from Pennsylvania.

[Billy reads]

Wasn’t that touching?

Approved by the FDA, the Federal Defecation Administration, and it’s certified.  That way you’re guaranteed, that if it’s from President Obama, it’s 100% Pure H#1t.

Order yours today and we’ll throw in a free Michelle Obama tampon! You’d think supplies would be limited but this First Lady’s always on the rag.

Get yours now!

Les has more Obama S#1t available at Sideshow Mirrors

*Les, I assure you I read the whole thing and did not just squeeze this crap out through the queue ~Fiar