Political Humor

Barack Obama was elected President of the United States of America on November 4, 2008. We covered the action, and even predicted the outcome of the election in advance. I personally took the position that McCain was just too crappy of a candidate to vote for him.

The next 8-10 years of Obama’s Presidency are going to be interesting. We are the opposition now. It is now our turn to shake our tiny fists of rage and be the new Daily Kos wiener kids of internet loserdom. Now it is our turn to be filled with incoherent rage for the President. Our battle cries will be Uck Fobama, Obama=Hitler, Not My President, Impeach Obama, Indict Axlerod, and Eliminate Emmanuel.

We will suffer incomprehensible cases of Obama Derangement Syndrome, and revile anything and everything that can be even tangentially associated with Obama. We will document Obamisms and release a series of woefully unentertaining books around them. Our lives will be full of misery and rabid hatred for Obama. It will be every bit as incoherent, and unfounded as the support for Obama’s platform of “Hope and Change,” whatever the Hell that was supposed to mean. We will uncover the truth about Obama, no matter how fabricated or false.

We are the new Republican Underground. We have zero tolerance for moderates, bipartisianship, reaching across the aisle, or any other forms of ideological weakness. We have spines of titanium plated steel, forged in the foundries of Hell. We draw our might by feasting on the flesh of babies and fuel our gas guzzling Hummers with the blood of hippies.

In the future, many hippies will be beaten, and stomped under the jackbooted foot of Conservative Opression. But first, I offer this opportunity for those of you reveling in an Obama victory to gloat.

So I call out to Moonbats, Hippies, Obamabots, Obamatrons, and racists that voted for Obama because he is black. Tell us how much we suck. Gloat. Wave the arrogant flag of your electoral victory in our faces.

I’m sure I would never return to this post to say I told you so. Never.

There is always mudslinging going on, some of it fun political humor, like when Obama is made fun of for saying there are 57 states. Some is disparaging like made-up stories about Sarah Palin pretending her grandchild is actually immediate family. We had no idea the venom the Liberals were capable of spewing until a woman that wasn’t a Democrat ran for Vice President.

It was like the left side of the blogsphere had their meds wear off at the same time, the free Wifi network at Starbucks shuddering under the intense strain of all those liberal moonbats rushing to make sh*t up on the internet. They made Chevy Chase’s behavior at the DNC look subdued and conservative.

But man can those Democrats sling the mud. I can see Andrew Jackson and John Adams wiping tears from their eyes in Heaven, or Hell I guess depending on your viewpoint.

Those two, by the way were the forefathers of the modern day mudslinger. In the Election of 1828, Jackson’s wife was called a ‘dirty black wench‘, his mom a prostitute, and his father a mulatto, apparently by one of Keith Olberman’s ancestors.

Adams was attacked for being rich as well as traveling on Sundays, and having premarital sex with his wife. At least this John didn’t have a love child with a video producer, right Mr. Edwards?

Speaking of South Carolina, John McCain was the victim of some nasty mudslinging in that state’s 2000 Primary when his supporters were called by push-pollers and asked if they would support him if they knew he had an illegitimate black child. Forget mud, someone backed up a concrete mixing truck and unloaded it for crying out loud.

When you get bitch-slapped that hard it is no wonder you vote with Bush 90% of the time. That’s mudslinging for you.

The best is when the candidates themselves do the dirty work. This was the famous ‘Daisy Girl’ ad for Lyndon Johnson’s campaign in 1964:

(Video Link)

With the production values of a crappy YouTube video, it doesn’t seem scary to people today but this ad freaked people out so much it was only run once. Guess who won the election?

The topper was of course Lyndon Johnson’s voice-over. He didn’t use a specialist like the now-departed expert Don LaFontaine. Imagine Barack Obama doing this? The guy needs a teleprompter in the bathroom for crying out loud.

Whoops did I just mudsling?

Chris Cameron writes this weekly political drivel every Thursday for Radioactive Liberty. You can also read his other attempts at being funny on his own humor blog, Angry Seafood.

Humor-Blogs.com is the home for funny blogs and pigs with lipstick. Just have a few drinks before you click there and it will look a lot better.

Although there is a definite politically conservative slant to this site, we mostly take a viewpoint that politics and politicians suck in general. This weekly feature is designed to make a little fun of the political discourse throughout the rest of the week, by taking an absurd position over an equally absurd topic.

In keeping with the tradition of this flame war parody, pick a side, and be just a little (or a lot) too partisan about your position.

This week’s topic:

What inflicts more pain on dirty hippies: punching them in the face, or driving through their zen rock garden with an SUV?

Discuss.