Political Humor

Fidel Castro Resigns

Cuban Dictator Fidel Castro has officially retired from the Presidency of Cuba. Despite having been dead for well over a year, Castro’s reign continued, until Tuesday, when the announcement was made that Fidel Castro would be resigning.

“I am saying that I will neither aspire to nor accept, I repeat, I will neither aspire to nor accept the positions of President of the State Council and Commander in Chief,” Castro, 81, said in a letter posted on the Web site of the state-run newspaper, Granma.

Castro’s last public appearance was on Cuban television in September of 2007, where he was accompanied by Johnathan Silverman and Andrew McCarthy.

Photoshop by Doug Ross

Fidel Castro is most widely known for demolishing the economy of Cuba and turning the country into a Communist Hell. Every year, Cuban citizens escape from the would-be tropical paradise, to try and find a better life in nearby Miami, Florida. Castro grabbed the dictatorship in 1959 and has been slowly strangling Cuba to death for nearly 50 years.

Bay of Pigs

The inept Kennedy Administration funded armed Cuban Exiles in an invasion of Cuba in April of 1961, in an attempt to overthrow the Castro regime. Castro dubbed the invasion Bay of Pigs because it was funded by “Capitalist Pigs.” A lesser know reason for the name Bay of Pigs Invasion, is that the rallying cry of the rebel forces was, “We will overthrow Castro – when pigs fly!”

They ought to have had the rallying cry, “Bacon!®”

As an Encore to the Bay of Pigs, the Kennedy Administration nearly botched the Cuban Missile Crisis as well, but luck was on JFK’s side… Well, until he got killed.

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