Political Humor

Barack Obama is ready to lead all 58 states out of the current financial crisis. With John McCain vowing to suspend his campaign until a bailout bill, an unidentified reporter asked Obama:

“Do you plan on attending the debate Friday? And is Senator McCain playing politics with this by saying he would not go to the debate?”

Anxious to take the nation’s top position for the next 8-10 years, Obama responded:

It’s my belief that this is exactly the time when the American people need to hear from the person who in approximately 40 days will be responsible for dealing with this mess. And I think that it is, uh, it is going to be part of the president’s job to deal with more than one thing at once.

He was then asked if he would stay on the campaign trail or head back to Washington DC to vote “present” on the bill. Obama geared up into superhuman superhero mode and replied:

If I can be helpful, then I am prepared to be anywhere, any time. If you need us, if I can be helpful, I am prepared to be there at any point. Presidents are going to have to deal with more than one thing at a time. Uh, it’s not necessary for us to think that, uh, we can only do one thing, uh, and suspend everything else.

Barack Obama can do more than one thing at a time

• He can send an email telling reporters the number of houses he owns.
• He can lift his arms above his head while reading from a teleprompter.
• He can assume the Presidency on election day while suspending the US Constitution… From his ears!
• He can protect women from being punished with a baby while putting lipstick on a pig.
• He can save the country from financial crisis while denying knowledge of his America hating, race baiting, terrorist friends.

Is there anything Barack Obama can’t do?

Other than speak coherently without the support of a teleprompter.

Video Link

What other amazing things can Super Obama do simultaneously?

Original image credit Capitol Hill, Washington, D.C. by Phillip Ritz This conservative political humor has been brought to you by Radioactive Liberty.

The humor has surely left Wall Street but the political handouts have only just begun in the worst financial crisis since the savings and loan debacle nearly two decades ago. Had they listened to me and my discovery of a great new banking service that I talked about here on Radioactive Liberty awhile back all of this could have been avoided.

Let’s not kid around though. The financial crisis is so serious George Bush went on television Wednesday night claiming there were weapons of mass destruction in the economy and that if we don’t give absolute power to the government and go to war we will be nukified.

No kidding, he said nukified.

Bush did not mention sending the people who run AIG, Lehman Brothers, and the other financial corporations’ leaders to Gitmo for waterboarding however. It is a shame because torture never looked so appealing.

Of course the rest of our fine politicians with their strong leadership are stepping up to the plate. Congress took action, by-passing their recess to burn the midnight oil and solve this crisis:

“Rep. Jane Harman (D-Calif.) wants to stick around. ”I am recommending that Congress postpone its planned recess. We should stay here until we find the right answer to this problem,” she said.

“If it takes two or three weeks, that’s okay,” said Sen. Sherrod Brown (D-Ohio)”

It is funny that when we had $4-a-gallon gasoline, our elected leaders of the House and Senate didn’t postpone their break. Back then we were taking the financial hit of course and not their cronies on Wall Street. None of us have given millions to their campaigns.

Try breaking down all the payouts and handouts and donations that have gone on between the financial industry and our honest and caring leaders in Washington and it becomes a political version of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon.

I can not blame the politicians though. I hear this time of year is bad to take a vacation anyway because the Hamptons are just swarming with leaf peepers. The beautiful people don’t want to want to deal with Nana and Grandpa plodding along in the Crown Victoria looking at trees. Besides, the politicians would have to actually be nice to them because old people are the most-likely demographic to vote.

On a side note, I am not sure I will be voting when I’m old. By that point why would I give a crap? Besides, old people aren’t good for elections simply because their reference points are in the past. They are always babbling on about how hamburgers were a nickel and during the Depression people ate their own shoes.

Speaking of the Great Depression, we need to elect Barack Obama.

Oh the fun you can have with a double entendre. But seriously, unlike Bush, Joe Biden would be the perfect person to go on television and help calm the frayed nerves of America like Franklin D. Roosevelt did in 1929. Really, it happened that way. Joe Biden said so.

He’d make a great history teacher by the way.

Chris Cameron writes this weekly drivel pretending to be a political humor column every Thursday here at Radioactive Liberty. You can also read his odd angles on life at his humor blog, Angry Seafood.

Humor-Blogs.com can’t stop licking it’s groin. Please got there to read funny blogs and make it stop. Kinda grossing me out.

More Conservative Political Humor

* The Secretary of the Treasury has an important message for the American people.
* Bush: Congress Must Act to Save Stupid People
* McCain to suspend campaign