Political Humor

A bunch of musicians including the likes of R.E.M., Pearl Jam, and Rage Against the Machine are mad their music was being used to torture prisoners at Gitmo.

They have a point. Those are good bands that generally play good music. When it comes to torture you want really annoying. The Meow Mix jingle, also used is not enough.

If I were in charge I’d play Nickelback, Daughtry, and every other band with the same sound and make the prisoners have to tell me which band is which or they get no sleep.

But I’m not running the show so all I can do is suggest songs that would really get under the skin of the terrorists until they gave in and spilled their secrets.

First up is this wonderful lyrical extravaganza.

Or how about this one.

This ditty would be good.

This one could be used in conjunction with the video. Tie in the “Clockwork Orange” therapy method for another layer of torture.

The terrorists would be screaming “uncle” after hearing this one non-stop.

If nostalgia and old-school musical torture is your thing this song is perfect.

But nothing tops this one. It is a song that gets in your head, and frankly, doesn’t end

Do you have any songs you’d like to see us use to torture terrorists? Leave your suggestions in the comments section below.

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Chris Cameron is a writer/columnist/beat reporter for Radioactive Liberty. You can also read his odd form of mostly non-political humor at his blog Angry Seafood.

President Barack *Hussein Obama’s Top Ten Apology List

10. I apologize for Gitmo. As a student of history, I know if it wasn’t for that torture chamber, Iran would have never taken Americans hostage in ’79.

9. I apologize for Joe Biden. No excuses, I just apologize. I swear that man’s head is a rock with lips.

8. I apologize for not getting the middle class more involved in sacrificing for the common good. But don’t worry, I’ve got the VAT and Cap and Trade just around the corner. That should make them feel better.

7. I apologize for *Little Timmy Geithner. He’s hard to take seriously. I should have picked someone that doesn’t look like Howdy Doody.

6. I apologize for taking my wife out for a date to New York, on the public dime. That was uncalled for. I’m the President of the United States, I can do better. I’m making it up to Michelle by giving her and my daughters a trip to Paris.

5. I apologize for not actually walking on water…yet.

4. I apologize for Hillary Clinton. That bitch has ballooned out so much, she can’t fit into her pantsuits. That makes me look bad, going around the world with that big, ghetto booty.

3. I apologize for being half white. I thought I was the Master of the Dark Side, but now I find out Darth Vader is my father!

2. I apologize for George and Barbara Bush being pro-life.

And the number one thing that I apologize for:

I apologize for my big ears. But understand, they’re not my fault. Like the economy, I inherited them.

* It’s okay to use Obama’s middle name now, since he’s revealed that we are one of the world’s largest Muslim nations.

* This just proves Rush Limbaugh reads Radioactive Liberty.  There have been far too many times when he’s said something “new” that had appeared here first, for it to be coincidence. I started calling Geithner “Little Timmy” way back on Dec 1st .  As far as I’m concerned, Rush can use me as show prep anytime and unless I hear from him, I’m going on the assumption that I’m right.