Political Humor

Santa Claus never delivers presents to Jewish people despite the fact he is secular. Just because they celebrate an alternate version of Christmas earlier in the month does not give Santa the right to simply bypass them all together.

I wonder if it is a personal issue. Is Santa Claus envious that Jewish people aren’t fed up with Hanukkah like the Gentiles and Christmas? You never see a Jew stressed out this time of year because their holidays aren’t complete pain-in-the-ass events.

Everyone talks about how much things cost these days, and for Santa surely there are higher expenses hitting the production end. With the recalls and lead in Chinese products, he is forced to buy American, which in turn drives up prices. Maybe it is too costly to train the elves to make dreidels, so toy-making for the Christians is a cheaper option.

The fuel prices alone must be killing the old man lately. I don’t know if they make hybrid sleighs, or what Rudolph’s carbon footprint is, but the rumor is that Santa’s workshop uses more energy in a month than Al Gore’s mansion uses in a year.

But this is not about St. Nick and his eco-friendliness. It is about why he does not give Jewish children presents. Even though the last thing he needs is more people on his gift list in a time of rising costs or environmentalists breathing down his back, there has to be something else behind this conspiracy at the North Pole.

Perhaps Santa doesn’t hate the Jews. He has to prioritize his gift giving to those who believe in a holiday that technically has to do with another potentially fictional character.

When we were children we were told that if we didn’t believe in Santa Claus he would pass over our house. Instead of the first born male child being slain, it was coal in the stocking.

Maybe if more Jewish children believed in Jesus then Santa Claus would climb down their synagogue and leave them chocolate coins on Christmas Eve.

Chris Cameron and Angry Seafood wish you and yours a safe and happy holiday season, even if you believe in Festivus.

Humor-Blogs.com believes in Hanukkah Harry. Go there now for a prize.

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