Political Humor

Drop Your Bombs Between The Minarets

Why are we in Libya? Hillary says it’s because of “…everything from oil to immigration…”

It came out this weekend on Meet the Press, Hillary believes we need to help-out the Italians and Spanish to keep boatloads of illegal Libyan aliens out of their countries.  Seems Khadafi doesn’t speak those languages, but apparently Qaddafi does speaks Tomahawk.

Well, the Italian language is close to Spanish, and the Castillian Spanish of Spain is very, very close to Mexican Spanish, so…

Kadafi don’t like it. Thinks it’s not kosher.

Leaked from tonight’s teleprompter excuses about Libya.

Obama: “It’s not my fault. I thought Hillary said she wanted a tax on Gadhafi, not attacks. I was all for a tax.“

Obama, Doggie Style

Reminiscent of the mythical Sirens, Hillary screeches, with her back-up singers, Samantha Power and Susan Rice, and Obama cowers, tail tucked between his legs. He’s turned into Hawkhen Hillary’s lap dog. Nice doggie. Roll-over. Play dead.

I’m sorry about the various spellings of the Libyan Dictator’s name. There isn’t universal consensus on this, like there is on Global Warming.

Unmanned Menstrual Cycle Kills Libyans

The more we at this rag learn about how the indecision was made to bomb Libya, the more we find out it was the women in the administration who were the driving force behind this unconstitutional action.

When you think about it, it makes perfect sense Hillary, and her feminist crones, would nag until they got their way. It’s also a well known fact women tend to sync their periods to the lunar cycle. Add to this, an usual event late last week -when the full moon was closer and therefore more influential then it had been in 9 years- and we had Satan’s own recipe for high flow bitchiness.

Obama says Hillary told him the messiest part will be over in a few days, then the heavy duty U.S. Forces will be swapped out for a much lighter-weight NATO version. The U.S. will then be left to pad around in the background.

Pure bleeding… heart, full-moonbat, lunacy.

[Fiar you're right. Daniel Tosh has pushed the line clean out of sight.]

Trivial Pursuits, Obama Edition

Obama’s Trivial Pursuits (hardly worth much thought or effort) = fixing the economy, creating millions of jobs, learning to bowl better than a Special Olympian, being fiscally responsible, finishing old wars before starting a new one, eating a Philly Cheesesteak, and closing Gitmo,

Obama’s Not So Trivial Pursuits (very important, would actually cross the street for) = Eating cuts of Wagyu beef, that each cost more than his half-brother George in Kenya makes in a year, golf, frequent expensive vacations, basketball, pushing unpopular agendas and appeasing thuggish unions. The National German Socialist Worker’s Party had the strongarm Brown Shirts, where as the National American Socialist Worker’s Party, a.k.a. the Democrat Party, has the bosses at the SEIU, AFL-CIO and teacher’s unions.

[I'm in no way implying that union bosses are workers or even wear brown shirt, but if it steps like a goose...]

Coming Soon: November 2012 Regime Change

Citing a vote finding illegitimacy (read that as you will), a small contingent of beret topped, cigarette smoking French lead a U.N. backed coalition to the White House, to oust Obama. The President reportedly read the strongly worded letter, shrugged his shoulders, picked up his basketball, and headed back to Chicago. Obama was seen smiling as he left through the front gate. A witness to the event stated the now former Commander and Chief told passersby, it was fine with him. “After all”, he said, “just like Libya, the U.N. told me to go and I went. It must be the will of the world.”

The French quickly moved to cut funding to the EPA, build more nuclear power plants, start getting the national debt under control, and lower health care cost by repealing ObamaCare. They also decreed that foreigners must immediately assimilate, or go back to what ever nasty, filthy, disease plagued, fly swarmed, mosquito infested, flee ridden, third-world, hell-hole they came from, even if it was France.

On the down side, Americans will now be forced to eat runny, smelly cheese, bathe once a month -whether we need it or not, jump at our own shadows, drink tiny amounts of some kind of coffee beverage out of feminine cups, and watch Jerry Lewis movies.

[Well, it could be worse.]

Parting Thought

Never throw-away your old dictators, they’ll always come back into fashion.

Some years ago I knew a couple of guys who would go to this one particular club. They went for two reasons. The first was, the Chippendale dancers. No, they weren’t gay; they were waiting for the show to get out, in one of the smaller bars. My former associates let someone else do all the work. They were vultures, looking for free and easy …pickin’s.

They also went to the club when the male dancers weren’t performing, ‘cause the female ones were. They went for the lap dances.

Men and ah, some of you ladies, if this has got you ready to leave this page and set your Google SafeSearch filter to the Off position, you may be susceptible to the hollow allure of Political Lap Dancing Syndrome.

Hi, I’m Les James, Doctor of Photography and researcher behind an amazing, recent political poll. In an unscientific survey, where I spoke to no one but myself, and I responded (multiple times), there was unanimous agreement, those who let someone else do all the work, and then swoop in for the benefits, and are prone to stuffing unemployment compensation or welfare check dollar bills behind the tiny g-strings of empty promises -in the hope for something more- are most likely liberals, and show definite signs of PLDS.

For those suffering with Political Lap Dancing Syndrome, metaphorically, it’s no different than paying for an expensive date, only to get a peck on the cheek at night’s end. These deluded individuals will then continue to pay increasingly more and more, and court the same people, expecting a better outcome. It’s sad, isn’t it?

Political Lap Dancing Syndrome, metaphorically, it’s no different than paying for an expensive date, only to get a peck on the cheek at night’s end.

Lets’ face facts as I know them, what they think they want looks really titillating on the surface, and it appears to be within easy reach. If they are willing to pay enough of other people’s money, occasionally they may actually gain a little short-lived satisfaction.

The problem is, in the end or other places, they most likely will come away with something really didn’t want and is far too easily spread.

While there is no cure for PLDS, Planned Parenthood promotes abortion as a safe method of preventing propagation to future generations.

Now you may be saying, ‘Les, you ignorant asswhip! You have no idea what you’re talking about and you’re just making shit up like Fox News!’ To which I reply, I know you are, but what am I? That, and my survey techniques and conclusions have as much validity as Election Day exit polling and Climate Change research.

So there.

Only political humor pictures can spread faster than exotic dancers. Spread some of ours far and wide today, they like it.