Political Humor

On a completely unrelated note to ObamaCare, but related to Halloween, I went to a 6th grade Halloween dance at the school. Now, first of all, I felt a little awkward showing up at the school, because that is the way I felt in school back when they made me go there to learn how to be a good little subordinate of the State – which they failed at, by the way.

Once I got there, I had an exciting revelation. It turns out they were having an election. I didn’t even need to register to vote. This made me suspicious. Is ACORN behind this voting thing? And just what measures were being taken to prevent voter fraud?

I was completely unprepared to vote. There were approximately 200 candidates, and there was no indication just what position each candidate was campaigning for. What were their party affiliations? What if the candidate I voted for “best use of Halloween colors” was really running for “most realistic costume?” Who audits the vote count?

Not only that, but I had no idea where any of the candidates stood on the issues. I assumed that the person with the most expensive costume was in favor of economic growth, and the person that made their own costume probably favored fiscal responsibility, but was the zombie surgeon in favor of Socialized health care, or opposed to it?

I cast my votes, not knowing anything about the candidates for office, which really isn’t any different than anyone else does in a political election. Mostly I voted for people that looked good, or that I already knew. Also, much like a political election.

I do think the vote was rigged, however. My step-daughter did not win for best costume, and I voted for her twice. I demand a recount.

Happy Halloween!

Thanks to Les for letting me hijack his Halloween picture post.

This week’s edition of Political Humor Quick Hits is about responsibility, Biden’s economic accumen, and compliments…

Obama Finally Claims Responsibility for the Economy

I guess I was wrong last week. Barack Obama finally said it was his economy to ruin, I mean improve:

During an appearance in Michigan Tuesday, Obama addressed some of the critics on his handling of the economy so far.

“I love these folks who helped get us in this mess and then suddenly say, ‘Well, this is Obama’s economy.’ That’s fine. Give it to me,” he said. “My job is to solve problems, not to stand on the sidelines and carp and gripe. So I welcome the job. I want the responsibility.”

Don’t sing it bring it!

Obama then went on to make fun of the economic downturn ala Snaps style:

“The recession is so short it poses for trophies. I saw someone unemployed kicking a can down the street. I asked what they were doing and they said ‘moving to a shelter’. The recession is so old Muhammad was in the same Gym class”

Joe Biden Spells Out Why Economy Is Not Recovering

Unlike E.F Hutton, when Joe Biden speaks people shouldn’t listen. Good thing his speech was aimed at senior citizens:

Vice President Joe Biden told people attending an AARP town hall meeting that unless the Democrat-supported health care plan becomes law the nation will go bankrupt and that the only way to avoid that fate is for the government to spend more money.

“Now, people when I say that look at me and say, ‘What are you talking about, Joe? You’re telling me we have to go spend money to keep from going bankrupt?’” Biden said. “The answer is yes, that’s what I’m telling you.”

I have to give kudos to Obama for sending Biden to address old people on the health care bill. Most of the audience either fell asleep halfway through the speech or didn’t hear him because of age-induced hearing loss.

The AARP members’ thoughts also might have drifted to the choices for the Early Bird specials at the local dinner during the presentation.

If the audience did get what Joe was saying they should have been clutching their plastic coin purses harder then ever before while wondering when Kevorkian was showing up.

Biden’s next stop: An education reform speech at the American School for the Deaf.

Umm Waterloo is Not an Insult

I think the Democrats, and Obama in particular are getting punchy lately:

“ President Obama accused Republicans of playing political games with health care reform Monday, taking aim at South Carolina Sen. Jim DeMint for suggesting a defeat on health care could be a “Waterloo” moment for Obama.”

Doesn’t anyone remember that “Waterloo” was Abba’s breakout single? Jim DeMint was simply comparing the Messiah to the beginning of the career of Sweden’s biggest export.

Is the Savior forgetting Abba later went on to create “Dancing Queen”, the greatest disco hit ever?

You can’t even compliment our President without getting thrown under the political short bus. Mamma Mia!

______________________________________________________

Political Humor Quick Hits is a weekly commentary on the news/current events written by Chris Cameron every Tuesday. You can also read his odd take on things at his own humor blog Angry Seafood.

In an exclusive, the  RL Inquirer has learned, from an unnamed source, the truth behind President Obama’s perplexing cozying-up to South American strongmen, Hugo Chavez of Venezuela, Lula de Silva of Brazil and most recently backing ousted would-be dictator, Manuel Zelaya of Honduras. In a scene that could have come right out of the Boys From Brazil, America’s first half-white President has buddied-up to Chavez, in order to get into the good graces of de Silva.

The question becomes, why?

Our inside sources have told us that Obama seeks to circumvent the 22nd Amendment, which sets a two term limit on the President. Obama believes that human cloning is not only possible, but available in Sao Paulo. He thinks a clone is not actually him, so will be able to run for President, after he is ineligible in 2016.

The History

Deep within the Brazilian jungle, Nazi scientist are thought to have first attempted cloning at the end of WWII, but were unable to get it right in time to resurrect Hitler. Work has continued in secret since that time -up until now. The earlier obstacles seemed to have been over-come by Brazilian scientist, but not without difficulties and set-backs.

Other less-than-successful attempts may have included, current Vice President Joe Biden. It’s thought Biden and several of other members of Congress were assassinated some years ago, by the mysterious Second Shooter on the Grassy Knoll. Unfortunately, the intellect of these cloned individuals didn’t develop as desired.

Recent advances in medical technology, and the mapping of the human gene, has made the exact duplication of a ‘fully functional and intelligent person’ not only possible, but apparently, a reality. Presidents for Life, de Silva, Chavez and Manuel Ortega of Nicaragua, and possibly Zelaya, are said to have already cloned themselves, to perpetuate their rule into the foreseeable future. It’s not known why Fidel Castro didn’t take advantage of this program.

The Future?

Obama expects to have several clones grown, at a staggered rate of every eight years. The first one will be ready for the 2016 elections. As a back-up plan, Obama’s Eternal Life Czar, continues to look for the rumored Fountain of Youth.

In related news: Michael Jackson has been spotted today in Dubai, Dresden and outside of a New England Boys Town facility.