Political Humor

Conservative Political Humor|Satire|Parody

The Controversial Birth of the Messiah

A Christmas Story

A Child is Born

Yea verily I say onto thee, to continue to write in this voice is ridiculous. So I shall produce verbiage in the lingua franca, the vulgar tongue of the unwashed masses, even down to the level of you redneck, teabagging conservatives.

For lo and behold… er, I mean, sheeettt… it be like this, dawg. No, that’s not working either. Okay, how ’bout this instead:

Once upon a time, in a land surrounded by warm seas that flowed with pineapple juice and bong water, a baby boy was born. But even this is in dispute, for some say the babe was brought into this world in a dark forbidding land, surrounded by vicious animals, and even worse insects and diseases. A few allege this child was designed in a lab, hidden in the Brazilian jungles.

Some say a guiding star in the sky heralded the event. Others claim blood on the moon.

Either way, he was black. Or maybe he was white. What is clear is that his unholy father was black, and his white mother was no virgin. Whether, black or white, it is said that when they changed his first poopy swaddling clothes, they found a whole deck of Race Cards, which his parents set about the hall, in celebration. While all of the facts surrounding this event may never be fully known, the kid did arrive. This is not in dispute.

The Child is Reared

He grew-up with his, now single, mother and her male friends reading to him from books. He was very fond of the works of Engles, Marx, Alinsky and Mao. Many believe that by the tender age of six, he had read –in the original German- Mein Kampf, and had memorized The Communist Manifesto.

The young boy was sent to the finest schools his white, racist grandmother’s money could buy. Upon completion of his education, he tried his hand at local politics. A natural born speaker, his words were a blessing to many downtrodden. It was time for him to ascend to his destined and lofty level.

The Man Rears Others

As with so many placed upon a soft pedestal of the Presidency, the seas of public opinion battered his sandstone monolith. Swells of anger raged at his base, undercutting its foundation. Yet this Savior of the Worker, this Messiah to the Masses continued his single-minded drive toward Fascism.

Soon, the pedestal was washed away completely, revealing the Cross, on which he still hangs. Unfairly burdened with the iniquities and transgressions of past administrations, he refuses to come down from his cross, in the face of overwhelming opposition to his plan to fundamentally change the land.

This Obamass, let us remember the sacrifices this man has unselfishly asked us to make, for the betterment of his career and the Democrat Party, for which he stands. Let us sing his praises.

Blessed be he above all men.

Les James is also available at Conservative Political Humor and Satire by Sideshow Mirrors

December 21, 2009   2 Comments

An Editorial by Barack Obama

As part of our continuing effort to endorse Barack Obama for President in the 2008 Election, Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty has agreed to publish this Editoral by Barack Obama.

Hope and Change for America

Editorial by Barack Obama Political HumorImage Source: Barack Obama.com

I’m Barack Obama, and I hope to be your President, when we change Presidents after the next election.

People often tell me, “Barack Obama, I was completely without hope. You could even say that I was hopeless. But then you came along with your message of hope and change.

And now I have hope that America can change, and move towards a bigger, better, brighter America. Brimming with hope for change. An America that I can finally be proud of.”

Can I get an Amen?

Kill Whitey!

Haha! That’s just Jeremiah Wright’s way of saying “Amen.” He’s my crazy pastor, I dunno, but my wife seems to like him.

what kind of change?

Well, I plan to raise taxes on companies that ship American jobs overseas. Hopefully, those companies will ship themselves the rest of the way overseas as well. Then there won’t be any more evil corporations left to enslave Americans with their oppressive sources of income.

Gas prices are high, and last year worldwide oil consumption was higher than ever. As a result, oil companies yielded record profits.

I plan to raise gas taxes even higher, and hope that I can continue to swindle Americans into believing that it’s the oil companies, or the war that’s driving gas prices so high. Meanwhile, the Federal government will rake in several dollars on the gallon

That’s no small change.

I sure hope we don’t lose that cash cow.

Ignorant… That’s America!

Haha! That’s just my crazy wife, Michelle Obama. That’s just her way of saying, “I love you Barack Obama.” I love you too honey! Forget Kathy Lee Gifford returning to the Today Show. They should get rid of that cracker and put my wife on the show.

A Vision for One America

No Known Restrictions: Gasoline Lines by Warren K. Leffler, 1979 (LOC)Image source: Gasoline Lines by Warren K. Leffler, 1979

There is not a Liberal America and a Conservative America. There is only the United States of America… Divided into odd and even license plate numbers to wait in line for their weekly gasoline rations.

Hey, I hear an ice cream truck outside. Now that’s the America I love. I hope I have some change. What? $3.50? For Ice Cream! I hope to change that too.

I’m Barack Obama, and I approve this satire.

Humor-Blogs.com approves this message.

March 31, 2008   17 Comments