Political Humor

Massachusetts voters came out in record numbers on a snowy, rainy day to cast their vote in Tuesday’s special election for the US Senate. Brown vs. Coakley. Obama’s agenda vs. the 41st vote.

But something was missing…

A lack of signs was the least of Coakley’s worries however.

Her issue was mediocrity. She was pretty boring as a candidate. And for the life of me I can’t figure out where her accent is from. It’s kinda weird.

Worse yet Coakley ran campaign ads that were so negative you expected the narrator to say things like “Scott Brown punts puppies.” or “Scott Brown leaves the seat up in a household of three women…can you count on him to care about female reproduction rights?”

Meanwhile, Scott Brown ran a positive campaign and defied the odds with a five-point victory in a state so blue three out of four voters wear socks with their sandals.

So much for that liberal bastion.

Someone pointed out today that 5% is not a big majority, because of course, we are talking about a Republican. Obama gets 5.9% and it’s a landslide.

Whatever.

Brown won and now the Democrats are, well having some issues. You think unstable liberals after a victory are out of their mind?

You have not lived until you have seen the meltdown, the sorrow, the sadness that accompanies a major Democratic loss.

Some are afraid.

“I”m surrounded by Repukes. I think I’m not getting out of my house tomorrow.*”

I like the wording: “…I’m not getting out of my house tomorrow.”

Like there are all these crazed independent political zombies roaming the commentor’s neighborhood in a quest for liberal brains.

Some are really angry.

“It absolutely sickens me….to see this solid blue state have some sleazeball, degenerate, scumbag filth republican as their “representative”. I’m even more sickened and disgusted to see Ted’s seat, that he held for decades on end go to this piece of garbage, cookie cutter, bottom feeding, dirtbag republican.*”

I didn’t know Keith Olberman is a regular poster on the Democratic Underground forums.

Some are so despondent they pull out the race card.

“The unspoken problem with this race is race. Because the election has become a referendum on President Obama, Martha should not expect the support of irish catholics who are traditional rascists.*”

This from a member of the party that celebrates diversity.

In the end you know it was a good election for conservatives when liberals are using things like upside down US flag icons in their comments and forum entries. One person even used 223 puke emotes in a forum comment*, probably getting angrier and angrier with every keystroke.

2010 is going to be a great year for conservatives. Liberals not so much.

[*All comments with this asterisk were from Democratic Underground and Media Matters.]

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Chris Cameron is a writer/columnist/beat reporter for Radioactive Liberty. He also has his own blog Angry Seafood.

I swear I’ve seen a lot of stuff in my life…

but…that…was awesome!

The 2010 Massachusetts US Senate Special Election became the political equivalent of the deer waking up in the back seat in Tommy Boy. It was weird.

English Matters But Doesn’t

First there was Martha Coakley’s ad misspelling the Bay State “Massachusettes”.

This was just a typo we were told. And since Democrats were so nice not to criticize Dan Quayle for misspelling “potato” it is best that we return the favor. So I’ll back off.

Then New York Times columnist Gail Collins makes fun of Scott Brown’s daughter’s English skills:

One of his daughters — this is perhaps the best-known factoid in the campaign — came in somewhere between 13th and 16th on “American Idol.”

“For our family, especially me being on ‘Idol’ but my dad being in politics, there are always so many people who have something negative to say,” Ayla Brown told The Boston Herald this week. Her talent was singing, not sentence construction.

But two paragraphs earlier, in the same column:

She is the attorney general, and her speaking style has been compared to that of a prosecutor delivering a summation to the jury. In civil court. In a trial that involved, say, a dispute over widget tariffs.

Hmm that bold part is a sentence fragment. (bold emphasis mine)

“Massachusettes”. “Massachusettes”. “Massachusettes”.

Some Democrats want to get rid of the Senate

Baffling, I know, being that they huff and puff and threaten to blow the house down whenever any kind of inequality is perceived to be real. But the Senate was designed to be the equalizer of state representation.

The argument?

There are 100 members of the Senate. But as Brown is currently reminding us, because of the filibuster rule, it takes only 41 to stop any bill from passing.

U.S. population: 307,006,550.

Population for the 20 least-populated states: 31,434,822.

That means that in the Senate, all it takes to stop legislation is one guy plus 40 senators representing 10.2 percent of the country.

That would be true except for one fact: Those 41 Senators are not from the 20 least-populated states. Here’s what we get when the facts are incorporated into the argument:

Population for the states the 41 Senators represent*: 151,357,784. That’s 49 percent not 10.2.

Now you know why they want to raise the cloture requirement to 67.

The biggest lesson from this experience however is this: The citizens are the deer and Congress is the car.

*A State’s population was only counted once no matter the amount of Republican Senators. Some actually had two. I know weird right? But in a good way.

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Chris Cameron is a writer/columnist/beat reporter for Radioactive Liberty. He also has his own blog Angry Seafood.