Political Humor

For Heath Ledger the worst thing about being dead - besides the not-living part – is that he will be forever known as the Brokeback actor. I know people are going to argue that his last role as the Joker will be the one we remember.

I would agree with you, except my mind is busy trying not to compare his final performance to Beetlejuice.

And what the hell was up with the massage therapist calling Mary Kate Olsen first? Apparently she needed advice on what to do next. I have never stumbled upon a dead body but I’m pretty sure I know the protocol.

1. Don’t touch the body except to see if they are alive.
2. Call 911.

Two easy steps.

When you are someone who felt the cold body, yet assumed Ledger was merely unconscious, would it be a too much of a reach to know what to do in that kind of emergency?

Last week:

• A dog saved a man from a fire.
• A cat dialed 911.
• Birds opened doors.

Yet a human dropped the ball.

The animals are clearly better at emergency procedures than humans, which is scary. What if they turn on us and use their advantage against us? Like in Planet of the Apes.

“C’mon Lassie, open the door so I can get out of the burning house.”
“I’m sorry Chris I can’t do that.” The dog says, ordering the parrot to clutch the doorknob thus preventing me from opening it.

Of course all I hear is barking so I have no idea the dog said that. The animals are sneaky that way.

There is no truth to the rumor that Mary Kate Olsen previously instructed the therapist to call her whenever a celebrity dies so she could get some free publicity out of it. Sure, it sounds macabre but famous people always ride the coattails of anything in the media for some attention.

Just ask Green Day. One of the many bands that used ‘Canon in D’ to create one of their most successful singles ‘Basket Case.’ It is no surprise that a group on its way out chose to hop on something familiar to go platinum.

Did Crosby Stills Nash and Young use ‘Ohio’ to create press for a world tour? Was Bob Dylan using the message of ‘Subterranean Homesick Blues’ to sell records?

In the end, Heath Ledger will be remembered for the guy who overdosed on six different meds and played a gay cowboy, while the rest of us got exposure from talking about it.

All aboard!

Chris Cameron’s other works of oddness, debauchery, and silliness can be read at Humor by Angry Seafood.

Humor-Blogs.com mourns the loss of Heath Ledger. Go there now to pay your respects.