Flame War Parody #47 – Throwing Shoes at Presidents
One of my favorite sports, when I visit Iraq, is throwing my shoes at the President. In fact, it’s a sport that is rapidly growing in popularity. However, some shoe throwing purists do not like the style that others have, and this can often erupt into violent arguments over the correct shoe-thrown-at-a-President style. For this week’s flame war parody, we will be borrowing from this Iraqi sports disagreement.
When throwing shoes at Presidents, which is the proper throwing technique: Overhand, underhand, or the even more controversial sidearm technique?
Discuss
More Shoe Throwing Humor
America is an Obamanation Exclusive: Shocking “Foot”age of Bush Shoe Attack!
Category: Flame War Parody Tags: Bush Press Conference, Ceremony, Flame War Parody, Iraqi Journalist Throws Shoes at President Bush
2004–2012
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Like a Frisbee, Oddjob style.
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Overhand is a good technique ONLY if you’ve got superior aim and powerful musculature to support it. Underhand is for pussies and girls’ softball. I’ve gotta agree with Les on this one, Frisbee throw. It’s much more effective and far more accurate, regardless of flinging material, whether it be shoes road apples.
This dude’s aim leaves a lot to be desired, and to top it off, his technique was shoddy. I see Mr. Bush SMILING between shoe #1 and shoe #2, laughing about it later. At least he’s got a sense of humor. And what’s up with the guy actually getting TWO shoes whipped at Bush’s head before those Secret Service guys actually MOVED?
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I have to say I think all three should be mastered so you can hit your mark under any circumstances. Say the president is running away from you in a straight line. You can’t throw the shoe sidearm because it’ll tail on you. You’ve got to go overhand with a little touch. If he’s running from you in a horizontal manner, then you should employ the sidearm method. Sidearm would also work well if he was hiding behind a narrow barrier. If the president is in an elevated position, with a barrier in front of him, underhand is the only way to go.
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This is a nice exercise and all but come on, you’ve got to admit that Indiana Jones had it right in the fist movie. Forget the shoes. Whip out a large caliber handgun and just plug those scimitar wielding Obamic, I mean Islamic fascist. No, I was right the first time.
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Who throws a shoe? I mean honestly!
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They work great as a gavel at the UN. Although Khrushchev mustn’t have liked his too much since he beat it on the podium and said he would bury it. Maybe he should have thrown it instead.
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Theres only one answer… As hard as friggin possible!
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I love these discussions! They always tweak my funny.
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I think you need to throw a Montana-like spiral. A Quisenberry-like toss could just take out a few other journalists. While I admit that is a great thing, it doesn’t accomplish the task.
I foresee a new carnie game.
(I really think Bush could’ve bare-handed the toss and threw it right at the guy’s melon, but that’s what I’d do, not a presidential thing to do, I guess.)
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What we really need is the undisputed champ of throwing shoes at Presidents, Hillary Clinton, to weigh in here, although I hear Bill Clinton praised Bush’s ducking skills.
Underhand is for pussies and girls’ softball.
Jumpout, you got called a pussy by a girl. You loser.
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I can still throw shoes better than her. We’ll see how tough she is when her eye gets put out by a well thrown stiletto.
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I didn’t know Keith Olberman worked for the Iraqi media.
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Of course you can, J.O. – NOW. I’m a gimp, my right-sided function (including my eye, so it’s no biggie if you poke it out with a heel) a vague memory thanks to my ever-so-friendly nervous and/or immune system(s) (doctors can’t make up their minds which or even either and there’s not enough money in MS research with it being classified “rare,” but when our numbers compete with AIDS, they’ll LOVE us and give us more than FOUR overpriced and essentially useless medications).
BUT… I was raised on a farm; we baled hay the “old-fashioned” way (as in, NOT those big round bales being forklifted around) and carried milk by hand to the bulk tank (as in, NOT using a pipeline). Back in those days, you wouldn’t have caught me dead throwing underhand, and I doubt you’d have beat me no matter which way you threw that shoe.
And just what, exactly, are you doing with stilettos anyhow? Those are SO bad for your back. I recommend flats, although I wore running shoes under my wedding dress….
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What’s JumpOut doing with a stiletto?
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AHA! SEE? I’m not the only one whose mind that crossed! Not that it has anything to do with throwing shoes at George or even the best throwing technique… But, dang, a stiletto has GOTTA hurt no matter which way you throw it, even if you’re not deliberately trying to put out my eye.
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What? I can’t arrest a hooker every now and then?
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[...] have a problem with people throwing shoes at me. Everywhere I go, people throw shoes at me. Many shoe throwing parodies have been created at my expense, and there is even a shoe throwing website in my [...]