Political Humor Writer’s Contest

The Writer’s Contest is currently on hold until such time as funny submissions can be located. Sorry for any inconvenience but since we’ve had so little REAL response, it’s doubtful anyone will be inconvenienced.

Here’s your chance to show off your talent and find out how thick your skin is, by entering a monthly, right-leaning, political humor writer’s contest with very little social redeeming value or reward. All political viewpoints are welcome but you’ll have a much better chance of winning, if you can at least fake being conservative.

This Month’s Contest:

For the month of September 2008. Who’s Hotter: Sarah Palin or Michele Obama. 250 word maximum.

How To Enter:

Just send us your best material to PoliticalHumorContest AT Gmail.com

Place your name and email address and your entry in the body of the email, not as an attachment. We will delete any entries with attachments, without ever opening it. This is due to all of the nasty stuff that creeps around in these things.

Privacy:

Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty believes strongly in the right to privacy. We’ll ever sell your information or give to anyone else. All we require is a name and email address. It doesn’t even have to be your real name. Except for the winning entry –which will be posted and archived- all submissions and personal information will find their way into the wastebasket at the end of each month. Can’t have it clogging up the inbox.

For more information, see our Privacy Policy page.

Cost:

A big, fat zero. That’s right, nothing. Freedom isn’t free, but contest can be.

Topics:

Each month -probably around the beginning- Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty will post that month’s topic. You will then have whatever time is left, to compose and submit your attempt at humor.

Prizes:

Again, somewhere around the first of the following month -depending on just how lazy the staff gets- the winner’s entry will be posted on the site for the entire world to read and poke fun at, through their comments. But here’s the best part, the winners can comment back. Is that the greatest prize ever, or what?

We might even post an honorable mention entry now and again, if we think it is warranted.

Deadline:

The last day of each month. We’re standing firm on that.

Rules:

Every month the new topic will be posted in the contest section. Along with the topic, guidelines will also be included. These may include such constraints as word count, style or voice. Follow the guidelines or risk having your hard work cast into the void.

Write in English. It’s not that we’re prejudice, we just don’t know too many words in other languages. Most of those that we do know wouldn’t be deemed appropriate.

A little adult language is OK, as long as it’s contextual, but try to keep it to a minimum. Intelligent humor tends toward loftier words, ideas and phrasing (sometimes), and intelligent humor is what we’re seeking. All you have to do is read our posts to know that. So please don’t make us speculate at your IQ level, we’re really bad at it and tend to guess very low.

The highly evolved folks at Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty have the final say as to who wins and who loses. We will accept bribes, but taking the high moral ground, we’ll not let that influence our decisions. If you don’t win, consider that you may have had stiff competition, the judges just don’t know funny when they see it or just maybe, you suck. Regardless, please enter as you vote, early and often.

Contest is not open to the usual suspects at Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty, their families, or other bloggers. Don’t get upset bloggers, you guys are something like professionals. This contest is a forum for those who would love to be in your position, raking in all that money and basking it the fame and glory of it all.

These rules are subject to change, but don’t bother asking.

Good Luck!

5 Comments

5 responses so far ↓

1 Announcing the Political Humor Monthly Writers Contest | Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty // Jul 3, 2008 at 7:06 pm

[...] Political Humor Writers Contest [...]
2 Satire | Jacko Auctions Beatles Song for Obama | Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:09 am

[...] Political Humor Writers Contest [...]
3 el guapo // Nov 23, 2008 at 1:08 pm

Jesus, Darth Vader, George Bush, and Buddha round table…and a knife fight breaks out.
4 Sandy Boswell // Jan 8, 2009 at 9:51 pm

Your web site says that “The Writer’s Contest is currently on hold until such time as funny submissions can be located.” So, let me see if I have this straight — you’re not accepting any more submissions until you receive some good submissions. Right?
5 odac snarler // Jun 25, 2009 at 10:09 am

I don’t see how to submit or what the topic
is. So I am submitting an article from my website

I Pasted in til you tell me more
Odac Snarler (banana news_

Republican Charge: Democrats do not Know Their Math

“A group of Republican Senators from the Finance and Ways and Means committee recently took three days of recess in order to evaluate the White House stimulus package, the housing package, and the bank bailout programs. After dissecting the new spending initiatives and combining this information with figures on more traditional sources of government spending, the Republicans party issued a statement:

“The Democrats numbers don’t add up”
“It’s worse than a mess. It will lead to taxes in the future” said Senator R. Shelby of the Finance committee.

According to key Republican Senators, Democrats are deliberately running large deficits now in order to force through future tax increases.

“We know what they are doing—force feeding the government beast so they increase its appetite for the money of future taxpayers.
They are clearly playing a game of poultry” stated a Republican spokesperson.

When asked to explain, the Republican spokesperson added:

“If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, then clearly the quacks have feathered their government nests with chicken games over future taxes.”

Republicans were also clearly upset with the just published results of a congressional poll on government accounting. According to the congressional survey report when one hundred and ninety two democratic congressmen were asked the question:

“What comes after a trillion?”
one hundred and sixty four were reported to have “correctly” answered:

“A quadrillion”

The many Republicans who answered:

“A trillion and one”

were reported to have given the wrong answer.
Republicans charged this interpretation of the survey report favored Democratic members of both Houses. Furthermore they charged that the survey report failed to highlight the obvious bias the Democrat answers showed towards fiscal recklessness.

Republican anger was further heightened when an independent Senator from Rhode Island, who asked to remain anonymous, is said to have claimed:

“One could just as well answer a trillion and two, or a trillion and three, as well as a trillion and one; or even a quadrillion. All those numbers correctly come after a trillion.”

Upon hearing this statement the Democratic Capitol Hill Committee put out the following statement:

“Any answer is right. There are trillions and trillions of numbers that come after a trillion. In fact, there is an infinity of numbers after trillion.’
It was at this point that Republicans charged Democrats of not knowing their math.

“The other side of the aisle is showing plain ignorance when they don’t know the difference between infinity and, infinity plus one trillion. Their statement just indicates the mindset that their government loving hearts and heads are in. And everybody knows infinity is not a real number. It’s just a place where the Democratic deficits are taking the nation.”

The Democrats immediately hit back by offering a new deficit reduction package that included small increases in cigarette taxes, a paring down of agricultural subsidies, and a new proof of Poincare’s 3rd topological conjecture concerning a convex rotation of an n-tuple dimensioned Torus in state space.

The Democratic proposal elicited some thinly drawled commentary from Alabama Senator R Shelby.

“Oh, no, it’s them tuples again! Back when,—-I looked all over my high school for just a one. I never could find nary a tuple in any durn numbered spot anywhere. If there’s a person who can find one of those high-school mathbook tuples, I’ll pay half of my salary for it.”

In response to the Alabama Senator’s remark, Democratic Senator C. Dodd of Connecticut admitted. “I never saw a tuple myself. But I know that in the previous century mathematicians were obsessed with counting them. Maybe they went the way of the buggy whip.”

The heated rhetoric began to die down when both Houses of Congress entered separate bills to fund government searches for tuples, or tuple like objects, throughout each state in the nation.

A group Republicans from the finance committee added two riders to the tuple bill: the first, stating that if any tuples are found, that their value be linked to the price of gold. The second Republican sponsored rider would order publishers of high school math books to replace the word “tuple” with “widgets”.

A Democratic rider, which would order publishers of economic books to replace the word “widget” with “tuple” does not, at this time, seem as if it will be in the final bill.

Odac Snarler
Banana News

Political Humor |