Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to the 2008 Radioactive Liberty Presidential Debate. I’m your host, Kevin Dubrow, and before my untimely death last week, I banged heads with some of the Democratic and Republican candidates.
Like with the YouTube format, we have an innovation that will have metal health drive you mad. Over the last week we have been taking questions from Yahoo Answers, and we rocked hard with the best ones.

For Hillary Clinton: “Spill your secrets”
~Gothic in Gainsville, GA
“I once had sex with James Brolin to get back at Bill for hooking up with Monica. I was also pissed at Streisand at the time.”
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For John McCain: “So who hates Mexicans?”
~Hoity-toity in Holbrook, Ma
“May I give the translation? Ha ha ha! That’s an excellent question. You might know that there was a poll out yesterday that showed me behind France in popularity but ahead of Mexicans, so I say let’s hate the French.”
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“Is it my turn yet?”
Not yet Dennis.

For Mitt Romney: “Regular or Magic underwear?”
~Trendy in Trenton, NJ
“I come before you not as the Mormon Presidential candidate but rather the Presidential Mormon candidate. Elect me and all of you get magic underwear.”
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For Rudy Guliani:
“According to the Declaration of Independence, who gives a government power?”
~Kombattled in Kansas City, Miss
“Noun verb 9/11.”
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“How about now? Can I answer a question now?”
Not yet Dennis.
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For Barack Obama: “A farmer wishes to plant seven apple trees in three rows with exactly three trees in each row. How does he do it?”
~Fashion-less in Fort Worth, Tex
“I don’t have experience planting trees but neither did tree planters. We invade Pakistan and get more land so we don’t have to be restricted to rows of three. You can’t leave options off the table when it comes to orchards and diplomacy.”
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For Ron Paul: “Where in Europe did the Vikings attack during the Dark Ages?”
~Exposed in Eureka, Wash
“I’m not sure, but if they attacked Europe again we would have no business being involved. If Vikings attack the homeland then we should defend it.”
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“Cmon, ask me a question! When it is my turn?”
Not yet.
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For Mike Huckabee: “Help about dumb blond jokes?”
~Mystical in Montgomery, Ala
“A blond tries to do her taxes. See, I told you we need to get rid of the Federal Income Tax.”
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For John Edwards: “If I begin an exercise routine, will I begin to lose weight with the same diet?”
~Pity-less in Pittsburg, Penn
“No because of the Neo-cons! You won’t lose weight because the system is broken. It is rigged. The Neo-cons want to march us all into the war on poverty. We need less corporate Democrats.”
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“God Damn it when do I get to answer a question!!”
Sorry, Dennis but we are out of time. Thank you to all the candidates for your candid answers. I’m Kevin Dubrow saying goodnight from Radioactive Liberty studios. Keep banging your heads everyone and make sure you vote.
Humor-Blogs.com uses the elfin magic of Dennis Kucinich.
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Chris Cameron is not Kevin Dubrow. He is very much alive and you can read his other works of oddness at Angry Seafood.

10 responses so far ↓
1
Skul
// Dec 6, 2007 at 2:29 pm
Hey!! Where was about Ru Paul?
2
von
// Dec 6, 2007 at 2:36 pm
Bleh…
3
Wyatt Earp
// Dec 6, 2007 at 4:10 pm
You had me until the Janet Jackson nipple.
4
Fiar
// Dec 6, 2007 at 4:16 pm
Ru Paul For President! I know the Vikings, and you, sir, are no Viking.
5
RT
// Dec 6, 2007 at 7:22 pm
That looked like a really painful thing on the boobs, there. Owie!
6
Chris C
// Dec 6, 2007 at 11:15 pm
Wardrobe malfunctions happen in debates too.
7
SinisterDan
// Dec 6, 2007 at 11:18 pm
“Not yet Dennis.”
I would suggest that this be his campaign slogan — but then it would need to read “Not ever, Dennis”
Nice work.
8
RT
// Dec 7, 2007 at 1:52 am
Kucinich is a birth malfunction.
9
Pope Terry
// Dec 8, 2007 at 1:33 am
Poor Dennis, maybe if he just sat on his hot wifes knee like some creepy little ventriliquist dummy he could win. Man that would make a great movie
10 Is Ron Paul Still Running for President? | Political Humor by Radioactive Liberty // Jan 26, 2008 at 12:20 pm
[...] to keep it entertaining now, that perennial Presidential candidate and Travelocity spokesperson Dennis Kucinich has bailed from the [...]
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